One of my biggest frustrations is when people are critical of the decisions that another person makes in his or her own life. People who married young are critical of those who waited. Those who waited are critical of the girls who had babies at 20. Women who decide to work outside of the home are seen as bad mothers by those who stay home with the kids; and the stay at home mom is seen as a sell out by those women with the corner office. And from what I hear and read the whole "to breast feed or not to breast feed" is even worse.
I've seen this countless times. I had a friend who was an attorney at a high powered law firm who was terrified to tell the firm that she and her husband were expecting their first child because she was afraid she would be looked down on for wanting to be a mother. I've gone home to sorrowful looks and puzzled expressions when I've had to answer the "Are you married yet" question yet again with a "No, I've been busy with law school." I've watched my friends with babies feel unworthy or inadequate or incapable because they have not raised their baby in accordance with whatever the book of the moment suggests.
I think that sometimes, maybe most of the time, the reason that we discount other people's stories is simply because we don't understand them. Because they are different than our own. Because the other person chose to have a different path and different priorities and different dreams. And because these things are different, we somehow make the determination that they are less important or less worthwhile or less "right."
But in the end, is not for us to understand the path of another. Their path is just that...theirs. And regardless of what that path looks like, or how different that path is from our own, it is theirs to take.
In the end, every person is worth while. Each story is important. Every person matters. Each life is meaningful.
2 comments:
Love this! One of the hardest things in life is to learn to be true to who you are, not what others want you or expect you to be! Especially as women, we should support each other's paths regardless if it diverges from our own! Great blog!
Excellent post. Far too often people judge those who aren't exactly like them.
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