Happiness Project Month #8: Nutrition

Well it's time for another Happiness Project report. This month, my focus was on nutirition. My goals? Here we go: (1) No sweets; (2) Drink at least 40 oz of water a day; (3) Eat at least 2 fruits/veggies per day; (4) Keep a food journal; (5) Find some healthy snacks. The results were mixed. Y'all, this is not an overly exciting topic, so I'm going to spare you the boring details. Basically I can tell you this....no sweets (which coincidentally happened to be during the same time as giving up sweets for Lent....) has really not been that hard, except I've been craving this amazing dark chocolate cherry bread from an Irish bakery in San Francisco that I discovered while out there for Bay to Breakers 2010. Fortunately, that has really not been an option. I realize that 2 fruits/veggies a day seems pretty minimal....baby steps. The food journal was super useful to get an idea of what I eat and how many calories I consume, but about 3 weeks was enough. As for water....I don't drink coffee or tea or cokes, so it's pretty much water for me. Plus, ever since I was a kid, my mom though that any problem could be solved by doing three things: Driving slower, eating more veggies, and drinking more water. I'm talking broken hearts, broken noses, bad grades, bad moods.....you name it, those were the cure. Since I always listen to my mother (wink wink, nod nod) I drink quite a bit of water every day. The one area I will go into detail on is healthy snacks. This might be useful for some of you if you're hunting some snacks and I would love to hear any suggestions that you might have!

Fruit strips--really tasty, and sort of sweet, which works well to help me combat my little sweet tooth after a meal. They have all different flavors, but I prefer strawberry.

Grapes--I love love love grapes. I figured out that if I buy a bag and then bag them into smaller ziplocks, I have just the right amound to take for a snack at work.

Cheese and Breadsticks--These remind me of my childhood, so my like of them probably has more to do with sentimental reasons than them tasting good, but you can get like 5 packs for $1.50 and they each have only 100 calories.

100 Calorie Cheese Packs--I LOVE these babies! I bought the kind with cheddar and monterrey jack cheese. It's the perfect little bit of cheese.

Apple/Granola/Yogurt pack--I couldn't tell you because I didn't eat this fast enough and it expired. After a bad experience a while back with expired yogurt, I didn't take any chances. Shame on me.

Ones--I love these little individually wrapped prunes. They have a pretty sweet taste, so when I crave something sweet, I can pop one of these and they do a pretty good job of stopping the craving! Fruit Crisps--THese are a new prodeuct and I really like them! Sort of like fig newtons I guess, but with a thinner, crispy crust and a smaller amount of filling. I'm not doing a good job of explaining, but I'm addicted and you should seriously try them.

Honey Roasted Peanuts--I saved the best for last. I LOVE LOVE LOVE the honey roasted peanuts on Southwest, as you have read about before. Well, I learned that you can buy a whole flavor sealed jar of them and eat them all the time, not just on airplanes! Score!

Another month down.....just 4 to go with this Happiness Project journey! Stay tuned! :)

Happiness Project Month #7: Money (Part II)

"Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work." ~Robert Orben

I have to admit that I was pretty excited about this month's Happiness Project topic. I'm the girl who has her checkbook perfectly balanced, has money automatically put into savings, and keeps track to the PENNY of where my money goes each month. I blame (thank) Gran and her childhood during the Great Depression. I grew up spending lots of time with her and she totally rubbed off. I say this so you understand....I'm a dork and that is why I was excited.

I identified 5 goals for the month: (1) Indulge in a splurge; (2) No paying to eat out; (3) Donate to a worthy cause; (4) Get financial advice from someone smarter than me; and (5) Read a good financial book. Here we go.....

Indulge in a splurge.
You know the saying, "Sometimes the best laid plans?" What about the saying, "Money doesn't buy happiness?" Yea. Remember those. Now, be honest. How many of you, when looking at the list of five goals above would think that splurging would make you the happiest of all of them? In my experience, this was the ONLY goal that actually was detrimental to my happiness! Here's how it went down.

I thought for a couple of weeks about what my splurge might be. Camera? New headboard? New suit? And then.....it hit me. What is one thing that I love and have always thought was the epitome of a successful woman? You guessed it....shoes! Not just any shoes. JIMMY CHOO'S. Now, before you think I'm crazy, I'm not about to pay $1000 for shoes. But I did find some on sale online for like 90% off (I'm sure they're from like 5 seasons ago, but whatev!) and I got super excited. So I contacted my friend Miss Penthouse View, who is the only person I know who owns any Jimmy Choo's and picked her brain.

(Above you see my hand actually holding a pair of her Jimmy Choo's...this was the first pair I'd touched ever in my life. Sigh.)

So Miss Penthouse View warned me they run small and that I should probably try them on. There's apparently nowhere to do that in this state, but fortunately there is a Sak's 5th Avenue in Tulsa. So....when I was in Oklahoma earlier this month, I went to try them on.....I was SO excited. And then I was SO disappointed. To say they run small is an understatement. My feet were no way, no how fitting into a size 10. You're thinking, okay....then get an 11 or 12. Yea, problem. The on sale Jimmy Choo's that I was coveting only go up to a size 10. Just like that, my big ol' feet dashed my dream.

After the stress of this situation, I just gave up. I didn't really want to splurge on anything else. So...big fat fail on this goal. But, I did learn that spending money just doesn't make me happy. In fact, it makes me the opposite. So maybe in the scheme of the Happiness Project, this was actually a success!

No paying to eat out.
I read all the time about how much money people spend eating out. In general, I eat out less than the average person. In part because I'm cheap, and in part because I don't like fast food, which prevents me from running through a drive through on my way home. But I still spend about $40-50 a month on eating out. I wanted to cut this out for the month.

Now, notice that I said I just cut out PAYING to eat out. Hey--a girl's gotta eat. If a boy wants to buy me a steak dinner, who am I to say no? I only cheated one time on my plan--dinner at the Martini Bar on my trip to Oklahoma....but.....(1) I was traveling and had no choice; (2) it was Girl's Weekend; and (3) eating out only once in three days on a trip is pretty good!

Did this increase my happiness? I think so--I liked not spending money on it, and I kind of liked having this goal to achieve. Will I stick with it forever? No way, but I do think I'll be more careful about limiting my spending on eating out after this.

Donate to a worthy cause.
You guys read about this yesterday! If you missed it, click here! Hands down my favorite part of the month.

Get financial advice and read a good financial book.
I don't talk about work or my co-workers on my blog. I'll make a little exception here. My boss is the smartest person I know. Seriously, that man can have a conversation about anything with anyone and he just knows something about everything and sounds brilliant! I'd been told before he loves to talk about investing. Sure enough, he does and he was willing to share his thoughts with me! He explained what the best investments are for someone like me who is a little afraid of the stock market (and FYI--index funds!), how to figure stock to bond ratios, what other types of considerations I needed to make (like disability insurance, regular old savings, retirement plans). He should totally charge for this advice, but I'm glad he didn't!

Anyway, during that conversation, he said that he would email me the link for a great book to read, but when the email came turns out he just went off and ordered it for me! His suggestion was Making the Most of your Money Now by Jane Bryant Quinn. I can't recommend this book enough--it's got checklists based on your age and marital status and goals....and it's really easy to read and covers EVERYTHING you could ever want to know. Fair warning---it's like 4 inches thick, but don't be overwhelmed!

Having the coversation with him and getting started on the first few chapters of this book did make me happier--I feel like I have much more of an idea about what I want to be doing and I think that this book will be a great resource in the years to come!

Conclusion.
All in all, I thought that my project was successful this month in making me happier. I feel grown up and responsible when I do these kind of things. :) Not going to lie though.....I do still wish I was writing this blog with a brand new pair of Jimmy Choo's on my feet! Stay tuned next month to read about my next topic!

Happiness Project Month #7 Money (Part I)

"We've only got one life to make a difference." ~Natalie Grant, Human

Okay, we're breaking this month's Happiness Project report into two parts. My focus this month was on money management. And one of my goals was to donate money to an important cause. Remember last week when I asked for your suggestions of organizations to donate to? That was my way to accomplish this goal. Thank you all SO much for sharing! I am inspired by the causes that are near and dear to your hearts and by each of you!

In honor of this, I've decided to donate to a charity suggested by each of you! I wanted to go through each of the organizations that I'll be donating to and let everyone know a little more about them (in case someone else might want to donate as well!) I figured there was no better way than to have each person who recommended a cause to explain why her cause is important to her......in doing so, this got a little long.....but I promise it's good! With that, here we go!

Relay for Life (suggested by the Blonde Oklahoma Girl)
I do Relay for Life because it is so near and dear to my heart. There is not one person in this world that has not been affected by cancer. Whether you personally have had it or have known someone close to you that has. For me, I have had a few distant relatives and some friends of the family, and while I was heartbroken to see people I knew and cared for none of it ever really effected my life until one person. My best friend in college was diagnosed with Gliosarcoma Brain cancer at the age of 23 just a few months before her 24th birthday. My world as I knew it was turned upside down. I had just celebrated my 22nd birthday with her and all my friends, we had a great time. The next day she went to the doctor and they told her she had a brain tumor and it just seems like everything after that was a big blur. For the next few months, I spent my time driving back and fourth from where I went to college to another town about and hour away to be with her at the hospital. I could go on and on about the trials and tribulations watching someone you love go through something that is beyond anything I have ever seen, but I won't. DonEtta Ann Cothren passed away on March 15, 2008. She is the sole reason why I Relay. I wasn't able to help her when she was sick, I couldn't take away her pain or her cancer, but I can walk in her memory, I can fight back against this monstroity of a disease, I raise money to support the research that is needed to find a cure for cancer. Relay for Life is an over night event that starts at sundown and ends at sunrise. Participants raise money and walk in memory of loved ones or in honor of those who beat cancer. Who survived. I have taken on more of a role this year, other than just having a team. I am the Survivor chair and I am truly honored to have this position. I know, DonEtta would be proud of me too. {I told you guys that my friends are amazing....here is Exhibit A! If you'd like to make a donation to Blonde Oklahoma Girl's Relay team, just click here, or leave a comment below and I will get you her contact info.}

Doctors Without Borders (suggested by The Bride)
I feel close to this organization because my husband {"The Groom"} is a nurse. I watch him show a type of caring that is so rare and a type I’m so glad people in this world have in order to go into that field. Knowing the tools and resources he has at his job makes me ache for those that are without the basic ability to not only receive the care they need, but the care from people like my husband. Doctors without Borders puts their donations towards providing assistance to people caught in crises around the world. This includes armed conflict, epidemics, malnutrition, exclusion from health care, or natural disasters. They also do this while operating independently of any political, military, or religious agendas. I think this line from the organizations website sums up their mission: Doctors without Borders rejects the idea that poor countries deserve third-rate medical care. {I had honestly not heard of this organization, so I am super glad that The Bride suggested it. The idea that people who live in poor countries die from diseases or injuries that are completely treatable is just unacceptable. I love that there are organizations like this one that help combat this problem.}

Wounded Warrior Project (suggested by College Roomie)
Last year I was able to attend a benefit for the Wounded Warrior Project, and since then, I have been fascinated with the organization and its cause. First of all, Gary Sinise and his Lt. Dan Band (Forrest Gump – holla!) {You seriously have never seen someone so excited to see Lt. Dan!} were at this benefit, appear at many other WWP functions, and travel around playing for the troops as well. But the real stars of the night were the veterans, their families, and all the wonderful people who support this cause. WWP was developed by some veterans and their friends and families to provide support to the wounded warriors of our generation. One such veteran told his story and talked about how the Wounded Warriors Project was there for him when he came back from overseas, injured, scared, and uncertain about how his life would be from that day forward. The WWP does not use government funds; it is a fiscally responsible nonprofit, nonpartisan organization that does amazing things for the men and women who risk their lives defending our country. {Regardless of political beliefs, I think that supporting the troops and their families is something that we all should do!}

Hospitality House of Tulsa (suggested by the Loud Oklahoma Girl)
I asked you to donate to Hospitality House of Tulsa, because it is so near and dear to my heart. In short this place houses family members of those who are in the hospital that do not have a place to stay. Basically if it was not for this house they would be sleeping in their cars or on waiting room floors in the hospital. To those who do not understand the reality of this hundreds of people in just the Tulsa hospitals do this on a nightly basis. People who are going to spend their life savings on that one hospital visit alone, because they were in a freak accident, will not have the money to spend on a hotel room for the months that theire family member is recovering. Please click here to read letters left by families who were blessed by this organization and see what this organization does every day. {Seriously, ya'll....read them! So moving.}

Let me tell you how I became a part of this organization. About 2 years ago I started looking for a place to volunteer. I felt like God was telling me I needed to help those in need, but wasn’t sure how I was going to do this. So, my church small group's bible study for the month took us on a field trip to Hospitality House of Tulsa. They chose this organization to tour, because our church donates to this house. This house is solely ran off of donations and is church based. They have volunteers that just pray for those who stay every day. While there I felt this deep connection to this place. It was like God was telling me this is where I want your time to be spent. To me it was more than just that though. When I was a child my father was in an explosion from work and was in ICU for 1 week at Hillcrest Hospital in Tulsa. One of my vivid memories of this time was how my family spent 3 nights in the waiting room moving chairs together to make beds and my mom not only worrying about my father’s survival, but were I was going to stay, because a hospital waiting room is no place for a kid. We were one of the lucky few families who were put up in a hospital hotel type room due to insurance after 3 nights with no place to go. Not many people have this ability and it’s places like Hospitality House of Tulsa that provide a place for them. {And it's because of volunteers like Loud Oklahoma Girl!}

Martha's Table (suggested by Sara Lang)
I'd definitely recommend Martha’s Table in Washington, D.C. They combat short term poverty with food banks and clothing programs, but also provide education and family strengthening programs to break the cycle of poverty. They're celebrating their 30th year of service this year, but with the economy still struggling, they're having trouble raising enough money to support their summer education programs. {It's always amazing to me to think about the fact that there are people in America who go hungry, so I think that organizations like this that not only help the immediate need of people, but also provide education to help break the cycle are super important!}

NM FFA Foundation (suggested by Codi)
When reading your blog about a charitable organization that could use a donation, FFA and Ag Ed immediately jumped to mind. First it's National FFA Week (Feb 19-26). This is a week that celebrates an organization of more than 520,000 members nation wide. Secondly, NM FFA is getting ready to kick off the 2011 Judging Season. This means for the next 6 weeks or so, Saturday mornings will start early (think 4:00am or earlier) to load up on buses or in Ag pickups and head off to places like Hot Springs, Carrizozo and Portales. Practice for these contests started weeks, maybe even months ago and "Blue and Gold Dreams" are ready to come true. {Remember it was a judging practice that kicked off me puking my way across Kentucky!}

But ultimately the reason I suggested FFA is because I know that you give considerable credit to the impact the organization has had on your life. Not to mention the people it has brought into your life. As an Ag Teacher I feel quite blessed to continue to work with some of the smartest, funniest and hardest working teachers in NM. When you are a student these are people who will drive all over the place looking for your next Grand Champion, call you when you've missed school to make sure everything's okay and are there to kick your butt when you need it. As an adult and colleague they are still there for you to mentor, guide and support you as you begin a career. {You've read a lot about my thoughts on ag teachers in general and mine in particular, but here is one of my favorite blogs on this topic.} For many kids FFA is the reason school is fun. It's where memories are made and their lives are changed. As a lifetime Alumni member I hope that this continues to be a tradition and a part of growing up in NM. {I couldn't have said this better! FFA was such a huge part of my life that I love being able to give back however I can. I'm doing some research now, but believe that the FFA gives scholarships in memory of Mr. Franklin and my good friend Levi--so I plan to put my money toward those.}

Helping Hands Hospice (suggested by my Mom)
I believe Helping Hands Hospice in Tucumcari would be a good choice for your donation. They help people in the entire surrounding area. Since we live in an area with limited medical care, sometimes Helping Hands Hospice means a terminally ill person gets to remain at home during his/her last days rather than having to go somewhere else. Any other Hospice is at least 100 miles away. This puts added stress and hardship on families who are already dealing with health issues and the imminent death of a loved one. This hospice has helped several people who you have known personally. They have helped people who have been family friends for three generations. In this town, many times when there are funerals or memorial services, the families of the deceased request that instead of flowers, memorials be made to Helping Hands Hospice. I believe this shows that our local people realize the impact this small non-profit organization makes in our town and county. Many people around here volunteer hours and hours of service to this hospice. I believe sometimes it is important that we donate to local causes which are not trapped in big administrative costs but use the money to help those in need. {I am a true believer in the services that hospice provides. Giving a dying person the ability to do so in a familiar place with people they love is such a huge gift.}

The Innocence Project (suggested by Claire)
If I could donate money to any organization, it would be The Innocence Project. Their staff works tirelessly to exonerate wrongfully convicted people who are serving time in prison. To date, they've freed almost 300 innocent prisoners, and with increased funding and national attention, they'd be able to increase that number exponentially. I can't imagine anything more horrific than being sentenced to prison for a crime I hadn't committed--that's why I think it's crucial that organizations like The Innocence Project receive the support they so greatly deserve. {I was able to work with this organization some in law school and this is a cause that is also close to my heart--I can't think of a more terrible situation to be in than those wrongfully convicted prisoners and their families.}

February Giveaway

"It is not the reciever that is blessed, but it is the giver. Be thankful that you are allowed to exercise your power of benevolence and mercy in the world, and thus become pure and perfect.” ~Swami Vivekananda

Well folks, we're going to change up the giveaway a little bit this month! As you might remember, I'm doing a Happiness Project. This month, I focused on money as the topic of my project. As part of that, I knew that I wanted to make a donation to a charity or some sort of worthwhile cause because I strongly believe in giving back. Anyway, I was inspired by Christin's blog post a while back, and knew this would be my way to accomplish my "make a donation" goal.

So....here's the scoop. You guys leave a comment below suggesting an organization that you think I should make the donation to. (If you have problems with the comment box, you can email me at tiffy83@hotmail.com or facebook me!) Feel free to suggest more than one. I'd love it if you'd explain why you chose the organization that you suggest so we can all learn a little more about you and your cause.

Then, I'll pick one and write a big fat (I suppose that's relative....) check! So even though it's not technically giving anything away to my readers, it's giving something away to an organization that you support, so I figure that's a win/win, right?

Can't wait to hear your suggestions! And feel free to pass this blog link on to others, or to share it on your own blog...the more suggestions, the better!

You have until this Thursday at midnight to get your ideas in, and I'll announce the winner in my Happiness Project post next week!

Happiness Project Month #6: Grown Up Adult Stuff

"I am old enough to see how little I have done in so much time, and how much I have to do in so little." ~Sheila Kaye-Smith

Fact: this blog is going to be boring. I understand if you want to stop reading right now. But you know, I seem to keep becoming more and more convinced that a lot of things about being an adult are boring, so bear with me.

For this month's Happiness Project goal, I wanted to focus on some adult grown up stuff that I have been trying to tackle for over a year. (See a list of all my goals here).

When I got started, I knew that there were a minimum of four documents that I wanted to create to accomplish my Happiness Project goals: (1) a will; (2) an advanced healthcare directive; (3) a power of attorney; and (4) a list of all important account information.

(Sidenote: Learning to edit my photos--took both of the ones you see here!)

I know this is not exciting, but I wanted to give you a quick summary of the documents that I drafted up just in case you might be interested in doing the same thing. Mind you--I am NOT giving any legal advice whatsoever--and laws vary by state, so be sure you consult an attorney in your state to be sure everything is done in accordance with the law. (My boss would be proud of me for remembering the disclaimer!)

Here we go--

(1) A will. Because I don't have any kids and I don't have that much money or property, having a will was probably not a necessity. States have what are called intestacy statutes that provide who gets a person's estate if she dies without a will. In my case, my parents would get everything, which would be fine. But....I wanted to do a will for two reasons. First, as an attorney, I feel like I SHOULD have one. Second, let's be real.....I sort of like the idea of being able to control a few things even after I've gone onto my reward (as Gran would say!) A will does not have to be complex--mine is pretty simple--it gives a few certain material things to certain people and directs some money to go to certain things, and that's about it. One important consideration is to decide who will be the executor of your estate---the person who will ensure that your wishes are carried out and who is responsible for a lot of the paperwork necessary when a person dies.

(2) An advanced heathcare directive. (Also called a healthcare power of attorney) I think you probably all remeber when this was thrust into the news back in the day with Terri Shivo. Well, an AHD just sets out your wishes with regard to medical treatment in the event that you are incapacitated. At least in my state, you can either make your wishes clear (i.e. I do/do not want life support) or you can have your agent decide for you. Some important considerations: (a) what do you want to make the decision?; (b) does your agent know what you want him/her to do?; (c) will your agent be able to make a difficult decision?; (d) do you want more than one person making the decision (this would be called co-agents)? It's not fun to think about, but it's important.

(3) A power of attorney. Again, all states are different, but here, you need a separate document to allow a person to care for your finances/property than the document providing for your medical decisions. The POA deals with the former. There are a few different kinds of POA's (some that are effective only upon your incapacitation, some that end at the time you become incapacitated) so it is important to understand what you are creating. POA's terminate once the person dies.

(4) A list of information. I'm crazy independent. This could be a problem one day. So I made a list of information that someone might need if I was hit by a bus. I listed out each account that I have, where it is located and the account number. Similarly I listed out any debts/credit cards with account numbers. After that, I listed out all of my insurance information (health, car, house) including the agent names and policy numbers. I also made a list of my monthly bills so that if someone had to try and keep my credit rating in tact, they could do so easily. This kind of list is also important in the event that a person dies because their executor will be responsible for certain things (like taxes) and, in order to complete his job, he will need to locate all of the person's accounts and assets. Along those same lines, I listed out any material assets (car, cows, sheep, etc) that I own.

Okay....boring lesson over! I know you are all bored and are wondering, "How did this make her happier when it made me want to poke my eyes out?" Well, I love to be able to cross things off of a list. Getting this done had been on a list for over a year, so I'm really glad to have it over with! Of all the HP themes I have done so far, I will admit, this was the least fun....but I am happy to know that all of this is in order and behind me! Stay tuned next month and I'll do my best to spice it up a little!

Ten Personal Commandments (Happiness Project Book Club)

"Well... We want you to be happy. Let's figure out what does that and let's do that." ~Sean Unger (giving me life advice)

So as you guys might remember, I'm currently in the middle of my Happiness Project! Even though I've already gotten started (read about my start here), I joined a blog book club that will be going through the book together!

When I went back and re-read the introduction, I decided that in my hurry to get my project started and to get my life organized/energized that first month, that I didn't take much time to think about some of the ideas that the author discussed in the book.

One of these points that I glossed over the first time was creating Twelve Commandments. The author identified twelve commandments that she would try to live by--that would help her to live a happier life. Why did she do this? She explained, "I didn't want to look back, at the end of my life or after some great catastrophe, and think, 'How happy I used to be then, if only I'd realized it." You and me both, sister!

(Sidenote: Yes I took this picture!)

So.....I have come up with ten of my own personal commandments and I've printed these out and put them a few places that I'll see them every day. (I felt bad that I didn't have 12, but then I realized there is some precedent for 10 commandments, so I'm good!) I'm tossing around the idea of doing a blog on each of these....thoughts?

- My life is now.

- Be kind. Everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle. (If it was good enough for Confucius...)

- I am enough.

- Why not?

- The people who care about me are always there for me.

- Don't miss any miracles.

- There are some things I just cannot fix.

- Pray every day.

- If I don't like it: change it or get over it.

- If I don't, who will?

Even if you don't do your own Happiness Project (which you should!), I would still recommend taking a little time to think about your own personal commandments. It's a simple exercise, but I think that it may change the way I try to look at things and situations!

Happiness Project Update

"Happiness is a conscious choice, not an automatic response." ~Mildred Barthel

Okay people....I've got to get back on the Happiness Project wagon. I really enjoyed the book and the 5 month's goals that I completed. But then, somehow, life got in the way and I just forgot! Luckily for me, The Bride is starting her own Happiness Project, so she's motivated me to get it back in gear.

Since it's the first of a brand new year, YOU can join in with us if you want to! The best part is that you can totally customize your project to what you want to do. Just to give you some ideas, you can check out The Bride's list, and my list is as follows:

Energy (did this last May....read the blog here! )

Do something just for me (last June....remember golf lessons? )

Work (worked on this one last July and August....recap here)

Do something for others (did the Bone Marrow Registry and Make A Wish blog in September)

Hobby/Leisure (blogged about my new scrapbooking method in October )

Responsible grown up stuff (January)

Nutrition (February)

Fitness (March)

Cooking (April)

Money (May)

Catching up (June)

What really matters (July)

I'll fill you on details of each goal after I complete that month! And, if any of you decide to do one, let me know! I'd LOVE to hear about your ideas and how it's going! And come on...who doesn't want to be on the happiness wagon??

Happiness Project Month 5: Leisure

“Live and work but do not forget to play, to have fun in life and really enjoy it.” ~Eileen Caddy

Well, I have to start this month's Happiness Project update out with a shout out to my friend, The Bride. She saved this month's project with a wonderful suggestion. Here's how it went down.

This month the focus was on leisure...or what the author referred to as being "serious about play." She set four goals: find more fun, take time to be silly, go off the path and start a collection.

This month was hard for me. I'll be honest.....I pretty much embrace fun all the time. In trying to figure out my project goals for the month, I made a list of things that are fun for me. I came up with: Kickboxing, hot yoga, running, the farmer's market, traveling, reading blogs, writing this blog, reading a good book, watching college football from my couch in my pjs, watching my favorite shows on tv and scrapbooking.

Well, with the exception of scrapbooking, I pretty much already did all of the other ones on a regular basis. So I couldn't add those to my life to increase my happiness. As for scrapbooking---it's something that brings happiness and stress both. I was complaining to The Bride about how I wanted to scrapbook, but it was time consuming and messy and it would take me forever to even print off all my pictures that need scrapooked, much less to actually do it. And then.....the answer came.

The Bride asked if I had ever thought of digital scrapbooking and sent me a link of her latest book. And right there we go--I had my project for the month! So, I decided to do a digital scrapbook for the first 9 months of 2010.

And I'll just tell you.....it made me happy and made me hooked! It's like the best of scrapbooking without the hassle---I don't have to print off pictures or pick up little pieces of paper off the floor when I'm done. But i still end up with a book that I can look back at in 20 years and remember what a great year I'm having. And I can still be creative and design the book how I want it. Total happiness boost right there.

If you want to check it out, there are lots of websites that allow for building your own book---I'm personally using Shutterfly because they seemed to have the most designs and options for lots of pictures on one page.

So, even though I just had one goal for the month, I think it all worked out because it was a good one and the project succeeded in its purpose!

Happiness Project Month 4: Parenthood (or not!)

"Much is expected from those to whom much is given. Much more is expected from those to whom much more is given." ~ Luke 12:48


So month 4 of the Happiness Project focused on parenthood.....needless to say I had to improvise. So, because I previously replaced a non-applicable happiness goal with doing something for myself, I decided that this month I would focus on doing something for others....so my goal: volunteering.

I'd been trying for a while to find a volunteer organization that I was passionate about to get involved with. I feel really strongly about finding a way to give back and about making a difference in the world. So when I decided that doing something for others would be the topic of the Happiness Project this month, I started to do some research. I landed on two different ideas.

First, I signed up with the National Bone Marrow Donor Program's "Be The Match" Registry. If you're not familiar with the organization, they have been working for 20 years to help find life-saving bone marrow matches for people with life threatening diseases, such as leukemia. Finding a bone marrow donor is often a patient's last hope, but 70% of people who need this transplant do not have a match in their family.

That's where the Registry comes in. They keep a database of sorts of people who are willing to be bone marrow donors. If someone is looking for a donor, they can check all of the people on the registry. If someone finds a match, the donor is contacted and the donation occurs. Signing up is easy, you just fill out some short paperwork, mostly about your overall health. After that, they mail you a little kit that has you send in three cheek swabs. And that's all there is to it.

I signed up earlier this month. So far, no call that I match anyone. My mom swears that I don't know what I'm getting into....I pass out when they take my blood pressure....this involves a needle into the bone! But you know....the idea that I might be able to save someone's life would make the passing out and the needles and the sore hip more than worth it. I sincerely hope that I do get the call and that I can make a difference!

You might wonder why I decided this was something that was a fit for me. I don't have an elaborate answer. But I have seen a lot of death in my life, and I'm tired of sad. If I could help save someone's life, and help to prevent the sad for their family and friends, well that would be amazing.

Second, I signed up to volunteer as a Wish Granter for the Make-A-Wish Foundation. I'm particulary excited about this because unlike the bone marrow registry, I don't have to wait around to make a difference....I have already gotten started!
The Make-A-Wish Foundation works to grant children with life threatening illnesses between the ages of 2 1/2 an 18 their fondest wish. A couple of important clarifications. These kids are not all terminally ill. In fact, many of them live to be adults, somewhere around 60%. They all have been diagnosed with life threatening illnesses.....this can be anything from cancer to cerebral palsy and a whole host of other illnesses. And the wishes are not just for the kids, but instead they are for the whole family. So, for example, if a kid wishes to go to Disneyland, the Foundation sends the parents an any siblings who are under 18. All free of charge. The entire idea started with one kid who wanted to be a state trooper before he died.

So, as a Wish Granter, my job is to help get these wishes underway. The volunteers do the interview of the child and family and help them come up with their wish. Then we work to coordinate the wishes and to help with "enhancements" to make the wish even better....think decorations in a hotel room or fun gifts to open on the plane.

Talk about a great gig for me! I have always wanted to be rich....not so much because there are things I need or want for myself, but because I think I would love having the money to really help people. Being a Wish Granter for Make-A-Wish is sort of like having the money to help people make their dream come true....but instead of having to save up for years, I just get to spend someone else's money! And I'm a huge believer in having dreams (hello bucket list!) and making them come true. I've been fortunate to be healthy and have the gift of time to check items off my list....I love the idea of helping others do the same.

The worst part of my work with Make-A-Wish is that I will not be able to share specifics on the blog. I will be able to tell you that I helped grant a wish, but I can't give out any details about the kid or the wish. But....I will tell you that I signed up for my first kiddo last week and I am meeting with her this week to get this wish planning under way. If you want to get an idea of how this works, the national organization has some stories on their website. I'd encourage you to read about Andrew, Christian, Ethan, and many others.

I think it's pretty obvious from the blog that I give this month's project a big fat A+ as far as increasing my happiness. They say it is better to give than to receive--I agree wholeheartedly. As much fun as the golf lessons were during the month of "doing something for me," the idea of saving someone's life or giving a sick kid their biggest wish is so much better!

Happiness Project Month 3: Work

“Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect. It means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections.” ~ Unknown

It's time to report on my happiness project again! Well, I mentioned before that I spent two months on my work-related projects. Since I spend most of my life at work (they never tell you that when you're a kid or even in college....but it's true so choose that job wisely!), I guess it makes sense I would have a lot to do there. I don't ever talk about work on the blog......I think that is a pretty good policy for me to stick with. But, I'll break it today since there's nothing paticularly juicy going to be shared. Here were my projects....

1. Set up my candle lamp. Those of you who know me are probably thinking, "Wow, this is what a lawyer really has to worry about all day?" And no....I have much more important (although maybe not more exciting) things to think about. But, it's my happiness project so I'll do what I want! I hate being stuck inside all day every week day. I'm a farm girl at heart and being stuck in a stuffy office just about makes me crazy.

So, I decided that I needed to get a candle set up to at least make it smell good in my stuffy office. My mom gave me a great candle lamp for Christmas---you just plug the lamp in and the light melts the candle (without any fire) and your office smells like homeade apple pie (or any other flavor...but I don't know why you'd chose anything else!) I have to admit...it improves my mood when the apple pie scent fills the room!

2. Sign up for an ag law conference. My law firm is wonderful and I love working there. But I am the only one with an agriculture background. So....I'm the only one specifically interested in agriculture law. Luckily, they are very supportive of my interest and have encouraged me to take certain steps to try and make connections and learn about building my own ag law practice. One of those steps was signing up for an ag law conference.

I finally got all my ducks in a row and I will be attending the conference this fall and am looking forward to meeting the people and spending a couple of days learning about the hot issues in agriculture law. Because this is something I'm passionate about and really interested, being able to have my firm support me and encourage me to pursue my goals is wonderful!

3. Organize, organize, organize! You probably remember the extreme happiness boost I got during the first month of the Happiness Project when I organized my life. Well....work was about three times that exciting for me! Let me explain. As a young associate, I always have partners sticking their heads in my office saying things like, "Hey, what's that state court case that says you can't blindside someone in discovery?" or "Hey, what are the elements of tortious interference with an existing contract?" The most annoying thing EVER for me is when I know I've reasearched this issue before, but I don't remember who it was for or what case it was in to find it. So.....I knew that a key to my happiness at work was going to be getting organized and developing a system for this kind of thing!

I ended up doing a few different things. First, I did an email folder called "My Research" that I have all sorts of subfolders with case citations and reasearch I have emailed previously. That way, the next time someone wants to know the elements of something I've already researched, I have them just a click away. I've also decided to build a "brief bank" of sorts. This means I'm going to try and collect everything I've written in the last year and organize it. So when I need to write another Motion to Compel, I have about 15 examples all at my fingertips.

Okay---be honest---this blog was boring. My friends will attest to the fact that my being a lawyer can be pretty unexciting! But....for me, these simple steps really have made work easier and more enjoyable! So....if you've decided to follow the happiness project, maybe this will inspire you to make some changes at work that will increase your happiness level.

Or, if nothing else, it will make you happy that you're not a boring lawyer and your life is more exciting than mine! :)

What Do You Know Now?

"Happiness is one of the most important treasures. It is within your soul. All you have to do, is dig it out and enjoy it." ~ Unknown

I'm a follower of the Happiness Project Blog. Every week or so, the author interviews people and asks them questions about happiness in their own lives. One question that she always asks intrigues me. Her question is:


"What do you know about happiness now that you did not know when you were 18 years old?"

I think it's a great question, not only in the context of what we know about happiness, but also what we know about life in general--about money and dreams and relationships and friendship and whatever else you can think of. At the end of last year, I wrote a blog about what I had learned the year before. I plan on doing this every year from now on. I think that this type of reflection is important--what are we learning as we get older and experience new things?

So, for the last week or so, I've been thinking about what I have learned about happiness now that I didn't know when I was 18 or so. I think for me, I've learned that making myself happy is what matters, and that making other people happy is only secondary. I'm one of those people who is always worried about other people and I never want to let anyone down. When I make a decision, I want to feel like everyone is on board with it and that everyone supports it and thinks it's the right thing.

Well you know what? That crap is exhausting. In the end, I'm the one who is living my life and I'm the one who has to make the decisions that will make me happy. That means that if I have to chose one job over another because that's what I want to do, then so be it, even if everyone else thinks I'm crazy. And if I want to save up my money and jet off to Europe for two weeks, then I should do it if it's what I want to do.

Some people might read this and think that I'm being selfish. But no one else in the world focuses on my happiness but me. I don't think it's a selfish thing.....I think it's a smart thing. I plan on living my life making my decisions based on what will make me happy, and not worry about what other people would do in my shoes.

In the end, we decide how to live our lives. We decide what opportunties we will grasp, what experiences we will have, and what paths we will take. Happiness really is up to us.

So what do YOU know about happiness you didn't know when you were younger? Comment below!

Happiness Project Month 2: Improving Marriage

“Don't rely on someone else for your happiness and self worth. Only you can be responsible for that. If you can't love and respect yourself - no one else will be able to make that happen. Accept who you are - completely; the good and the bad - and make changes as YOU see fit - not because you think someone else wants you to be different.” ~Stacy Charter

I've finished up the second month of my Happiness Project. As I mentioned previously, the author, Gretchen Rubin's, second month was dedicted to increasing the happiness in her marriage. I don't have one of those, so I had to improvise.

I decided this month's project would be to do something totally for myself. I thought about different things that I could do that would make me happy, and settled on.....drumroll please.....

Golf Lessons!

Now, you have to understand a few things.

First off, my only golf experience has been with BFF and one of the Animal House boys from college. We would go to the driving range, or to the cheap golf course in Stillwater and play periodically. They are both pretty decent, I was just starting. So, they "helped" me learn. I distinctly remember BFF screaming at me one day and saying, "Tiffany, you're just swinging like a girl!" I threw down the club and yelled back, "BFF, I AM A GIRL!" (I've mentioned before that our relationship is like this....) Anyway, the point is, I have never really had great instruction.

Second, golf can be really frustrating. I'm pretty athletic. Usually I can pick up any ball or bat or racket and hold my own. It drives me crazy to go to the driving range and see fat old dudes or little kids who are way better than me. But it happened every time I went! So....golf lessons seemed necessary.

I called up a golf course here in town and signed up for 5 lessons. Here is a brief play-by-play of the two so far.

Lesson 1:

Not going to lie, my main concern was what to wear. I mean, perception is reality, so I wanted to at least look like I fit in on the driving range. After NO help from BFF or Cousin Kevin, who were both annoyed I would even ask this question, I headed to my lesson. I met up with my coach on the driving range and we went to work. The first thing he says is, "Let's videotape you and see how your swing looks." My response was, "Hold up there pal, let's start with you showing me how to hold a club and go from there." He quickly understood and put the video camera away for another day!

So we started with the basics. When I was finally ready to swing, I hit the ball on the first try (yay for small victories!) and he assured me that I was in good shape and that I had a "very athletic swing." This was like music to my ears.

My only complaint about the first lesson is that it was too hot. I went at 10:30 on a Saturday morning and it was miserable. It felt like I was doing hot golf instead of hot yoga. Lesson learned--go first thing at night or first thing in the morning from now on!

Lesson 2:

This time, I decided that a lesson in the evenings might be a good idea. For the girls following the blog interested in fashion, I rocked my favorite orange Tommy sleeveless polo (see above). Anyway, this time, the golf coach insisted on filming. This just about gave me a panic attack. It was a flashback to law school Evidence & Trial Practice class where the teacher videoed you doing practice arguments and questioning witnesses, then made you watch yourself. I learned quickly that I hated my hair and the sound of my own voice on video.

Luckily, my golf swing faired better on tape. We watched the video, the golf coach made a few corrections to my swing (like the fact that I didn't release the club so my hands were backwards on the follow through--something that one of the boys should have realized had they not been so busy yelling at me!). So I've improved quite a bit thus far. I can now hit the ball fairly consistantly about 100 yards or so with a 7 iron. I feel that to be success for now.

All in all, I think golf lessons have increased my happiness level. It's fun to be outside in the sun, fresh air and quiet on a golf course. It's relaxing and sort of theraputic to be able to hit something with a club. It's also nice to have been able to set a goal to work toward, and to do something that really is just for me.

And, last but not least, it doesn't hurt that my golf coach is a couple years older than me, not married, and pretty cute....stay tuned to see where this goes.

Happiness Project Month 1: Increasing Energy

“Nothing can bring you happiness but yourself.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

First month of the Happiness Project down. (Quick side note--the author of the book, herself, commented on my first post! This was so one of the most exciting things to happen in my blogging experience.)

The goal of the first month is to improve my energy level. The author of the book set four goals: to sleep more; to exercise more; to clear out clutter; and to act energetic. So, because I'm pretty good about sleeping and exercising, and I'm not sure how much I believe the "act how you want to feel" mantra, I improvised a little.

I identified three goals: napping, cleaning and clearing out clutter.


1. Napping: I love to take a nap. Seriously, I'd rather get up early and be able to sleep for an hour in the afternoon. I blame my Gran for this--you read about her recently--she took a nap every afternoon when I was growing up and I thought it was really cool! Since I have a job where I'm crazy busy (and bill by the hour!) napping during the week is not an option. So, instead, I decided that I'd include time for one nap every weekend. So far, it's worked out well and I do think it improves my mood.

2. Cleaning: So I'm a very organized person, but I tend to let cleaning slide a bit. It just seems to take so much time and energy to dust and mop and vaacum (is it two a's or two u's in that word? or two c's? I don't know) and clean the shower. For a while now I've just felt sort of overwhelmed and like I spent too much of my weekend doing this stuff. I knew a couple of people who I went to law school with or work with who hired someone to clean for them once every other week or so. I felt really guilty about this--who did I think I was that I was too good to do my own cleaning? Yea....then I asked around and realzied EVERYONE I work with and a ton of other young lawyers I know have one. I invested. Pretty sure when I walked in after she was done and my house smelled like heaven, it was well worth the money! Happy---check!


3. Clearing out clutter: This has been AMAZING for me! Like I said, I'm very organized. If you came into my house, things would pretty much be put away where they belong and I could tell you where they were. I am, however, also somewhat of a packrat. I blame my Gran for this as well. She grew up in the depression and saved everything. When she died and we cleaned out the kitchen, I bet she had a million canning jars and those plastic bags you put fruit in at the grocery store. She had medicine that expired ten years earlier and a case full of fake teeth. Apparently, she rubbed off on me.

Well, the author of the book had a couple rules. If you save something because you "might need to use it later" you need to throw it away. And if you save something for purely sentimental reasons, throw it away. (There are exceptions of course---pictures, family heirloom jewelery, etc.) The last rule College Roomie and I developed....."Free clutter is still clutter."

So I started out in my office area. I threw away 7 bags full of stuff one weekend. Old cases I printed out for law school my first year. Old books, folders, magazines. I moved a shelf of plastic drawers from the bathroom to the office and found medicine that expired when I was still in high school and lotion I remember buying in the 8th grade. I found a sample size cologne that was the kind First Valentine wore....which indicates this has been around since circa 6th grade. Yea. It was amazing. I so should have done a before picture, but here's an after.

Then I moved to my laundry room, which was full of boxes and junk and totally a mess. I moved in some shelves, discovered that my dryer was jacked up (you read about that earlier) and threw out 5 more loads of stuff. Again, no before picture, but here's an after.
The latest project was the garage. While it wasn't a terrible mess, it needed some cleaning out done. My friend who lived here before me planned her whole wedding and kept everything in her garage, so it needed some sweeping away of bits of wedding decor. And I saved my moving boxes which needed to be broken down and neatly put away. Now it looks pretty good if I do say so myself.
Those were my three big goals for cleaning out clutter, but I liked it so much, I expanded into my pantry and closets.
Anyway, so far the Happiness Project has been great. I do feel happier and more productive.
Stay tuned for next month.....the author worked on her marriage the second month. I don't have one of those, so instead I've got a totally different idea, and let me assure you, I'm excited!

Miss Independent

“A woman is like a tea bag, you can not tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water.” ~Nancy Reagan


I like to think of myself as being a pretty independent girl. I'm a single twenty-something living on my own, paying my own bills, making my own money, and making my own decisions. There's not a lot of things I feel like I can't handle.


I had a moment last weekend with my dryer that made me wonder.....Why is it when a home maintainence issue arises, the first thing I think of is "I need a boyfriend for things like this." That's a problem!


So, as part of my Happiness Project (there will be plenty to report when May is over!), I was cleaning out my laundry room. Once I dug back to the back, I find that the little tube thing (yes, that's the technical term) that takes the lent and whatever else from the dryer out of the house had come loose from the wall. Lent had been sprayed ALL OVER the walls and floor. On top of that, I had two bottles of distilled water that had somehow gotten holes in them and were leaking everywhere.

I threw my hands up, and went to my boyfriend thought. Then, I went to my, I at least need the Animal House boys from college to live closer to come fix these things. I racked my brain through my law school guy friends and decided that I am pretty sure I'm more mechanical than they are. I called my dad to complain.


After all of this nonsense.....I put my big girl pants on and went to work. I fixed the hose and the clamp. I hauled all of the boxed andshelves out of the room. I cleaned and moved and organized everything. And you know what? There wasn't a boy in sight.


Even when we think of ourselves as being independent girls, sometimes we revert right to the damsel in distress feeling. There's something good about a little reminder from the world that we can do things ourselves!

The Happiness Project

"Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be." ~ Abraham Lincoln


I think I've mentioned before I usually read about 4 or 5 books at a time. College Roomie says she thinks I may have undiagnosed ADD. But I get bored reading the same thing every night before I go to bed, so I try to mix it up. The most recent addition to the list....The Happiness Project. Apparently I've had happiness on the brain lately, as I recently blogged about the topic.

Here is how the author's Happiness Project started: "I'd always vaguely expected to outgrow my limitations. One day, I'd stop twisting my hair, and wearing running shoes all the time, and eating exactly the same food every day. I'd remember my friends' birthdays, I'd learn Photoshop, I wouldn't let my daughter watch TV durin breakfast. I'd read Shakespeare. I'd spend more time laughing and having fun, I'd be more polite, I'd visit museums more often, I wouldn't be scared to drive. One April day on a morning jus tlike every other morning, I had a sudden realization: I was in danger of wasting my life." (Gretchen Ruben, The Happiness Project)

After this, she began a year's journey that she called her Happiness Project. Each month, she decided that she would focus on improving one area in her life. Within each category, she'd pick 3-4 goals to focus on. Sounds simple, right? By the end of the year, she would try and put each of these goals into action.

So, I've decided that I will start a similar project in my own life. The first of each month, I'll let you know what the category and the goals for the month are. Instead of developing my own categories, I'm stealing Gretchen's. I will, however, design my own goals within each category. Hope you'll enjoy my journey! Stay tuned for May 1.... (FYI--I started a week early on the first one since I'll be gone to Calf Fry next weekend and let's just say I'm already loving it!)