Why My Parents Are a Bad Example

Yesterday, my parents celebrated their 35th wedding anniversary.  As I looked over the dozens of comments on Facebook, many of them mentioned what a good example my parents' marriage is.

The more I thought about it, the more I realized that they are actually a bad example of marriage looks like.

Because they make it look too easy.

And from what everyone tells me, marriage is hard.  It takes work and dedication and effort.  Every single day. You have to learn to accept and forgive and sacrifice.  There are times you want to beat the other person with a frying pan, and times you want to just walk away.  I've seen other couples speak hatefully towards each other or about each other to people.  I've seen relationships full of lying and deceit and plain unhappiness.

But not these two.

They started out with a single wide trailer house, a wedding dress from Sears and a hand me down engagement ring.  And 35 years later, they are always happy.  They are always laughing.  They harass each other a lot.  I can probably count on one hand the number of times I have honestly seen them fight.  They still act like teenagers when they go to Vegas.  They always seem to know the right thing to do.

They just make marriage look more like fun than like work.  

And that's why they are a bad example.

But maybe they know the trick.  Maybe it is this.  Maybe if you marry the right person, 35 years later you look back and even the work seems fun because you're doing it together.

It worked for those these two kids 35 years ago.