Today is the last blog in our series.....I thought I'd go the flip side and ask my single girlfriend what things people say that they probably mean to be encouraging, but are actually totally annoying. They made quite the list!
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| Single people are fun too. |
So let's consider putting these on the "not to be uttered" list, shall we?
"You're trying too hard." It doesn’t bother me when people say things like “he’s out there somewhere” or “give it time” because I think those cliches are sincere and absolutely true. But I positively hate when people say things like “you’re trying too hard.” Excuse me? How do you know I’m trying so hard? Do you know something I don’t? Because you know what i’m doing right now? I’m sitting on the couch eating some soup and watching Netflix. I had no idea that I’ve been actively recruiting potential boyfriends in sweatpants on my couch this entire time.
"It will come when you least expect it"
"You're still so young"
"Its not you"
Don't make dumb suggestions of who I could date. I get so tired of "well (you have to draw this well out. weaaaalllll..) you could always date {insert name here}" as if I am invited to a dinner party last minute and looking for something decent to wear in my closet. "Oh hey, this dress isn't too wrinkled. It will work for the occasion." "{insert name here} is single and not too old, he has some baggage but he's not too messed up." Come on people!!
"You are too good for them" (which i never can figure out, if I'm too good for them, then it would be MY choice to be with them or not)
"At least you don't have to take care of someone else." - This actually makes me sad for the person who tells me this. Why do you feel you HAVE to take care of the person you are married to? Why do you not WANT to care for your spouse?
"You should pray more about it."- I completely understand this, and trust me I pray for my husband on the regular. But if I bug the Big Man upstairs one more time about a spouse he is actually going to spite me for not praying for other attributes and people. You pray for me since you are so concerned about my marital status.
"People are getting married and having kids later and later now. I'm sure you'll find him."- Thanks, it was my plan all along to not find him till ..."later and later" becomes an issue. Also, why do I have to find him? Why can't he find me?
"I envy you and all the adventures you get to take....because it is just you." - You had to throw that last part in, didn't you? Why do you not take adventures with your significant other? Having fun and doing amazing things should not stop when you find The One.
"We all have to kiss a lot of frogs." Because thinking of men as amphibian creatures is exactly what I want to hear when I am dating and you have a Prince Charming. Also if you are married to your high school sweetheart or the first guy you kissed, DO NOT SAY THIS.
"But you are so great, the whole package. I just don't understand how someone hasn't snatched you up yet." or "I always pictured you being married with kids by now." Thank you, now I am going to go home and think about what dark, twisty part of me is repelling men from "snatching me up."
"Our relationship is just perfect. You'll find that too." This is the one that kills me; it makes me question a lot about a relationship when I am in one, or makes me apprehensive to commit to a new one. I will be the first to own up to never having a perfect relationship, and I think that is just fine. However, when people tell me their relationship is perfect, it makes me doubt myself and whoever I am dating at the time, or not dating. Do I have to find perfect? Do you not have disagreements or misunderstanding? Do you really agree on everything? Do you think it is okay that he leaves his socks inside out on the bathroom floor? Because if "perfection" is what I am supposed to look for, I don't think that is going to happen. I think I am going to marry someone perfect for me, but I have no expectation for a "perfect relationship" at all times.
3 comments:
Boom! Nailed it with this one ha.
Another perfect post in this series. A few weeks ago, I was lamenting how hard it is to find a guy who actually seems interested in me. Her response? "I think you're one of those women who will get swept off your feet when you're like 50." I'm sure she was trying to make me feel better, but since I'm 34 now, that is NOT what I wanted to hear.
Great series and I couldn't agree more with these.....don't want to hear them! :) Just bring the Ben and Jerry's if these are on the lips of married folks :)
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