"A man's friendships are one of the best measures of his worth." ~Charles Darwin
I read several blogs each day even though I don't know the writers. Last week, I had smoke coming out of my ears after reading what one girl wrote on her blog. Of course, this means I have to rant.
The Anonymous Blogger is getting married soon, and her blog was discussing her expectations for marriage. Most of them were fine....then one of them blindsided me.
"His female friends from high school (he graduated 11 years ago) will stop calling him to chat. I know it only happens maybe 2-3 times per year and there are only like 2 girls who do it and he may only see them once a year when they come into town, but it still bugs me and I will want it to stop."
Are you freaking kidding me Anonymous Blogger? As the girl who has always been on the other end of the phone in this situation, I am horribly offended.
Girls and guys can be really good friends---and that's all. There are lots of boys in my life who I love dearly and consider some of my best friends, and have no other feelings for. I don't see anything wrong with this type of friendship continuing on after the guy gets married.
Clearly when the guy is marrying another girl and is not even seeing the girl on the phone except for once a year, there is no threat there. And what happened to trusting someone in a relationship? Call me crazy.
It can be really hard when your guy friends get into relationships. If you're not lucky, you end up losing your guy friend. It's hard and it's not fair. Sometimes, if you're lucky, like I've been with a handful of my boys, you end up keeping your guy friend and gaining a girl friend out of the deal too.
So my message is this. If you're a guy--stand up for your girl friends. They've probably been there for you through a lot and they don't deserve to get dumped for no reason. I'm not saying your relationship should not change at all. Clearly priorities shift and your relationship changes some--but I think having to cut someone completely out of your life is just ridiculous.
And to the girlfriends/fiancees/wives of the boys in my life who have not made me get dumped--some of whom I'm including on the blog--thank you. You're wonderful and I'm so glad my boys found you!
I appreciate not being dumped. In return, I strive to always send birthday and anniversary cards and cool baby presents. See? The girl friends might just be worth keeping around.
Life Update With Rotations
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