The True Value of My Law Degree (in the form of me on a soapbox)

Yesterday, I read an interesting blog post written by an Ivy League educated woman who is now a stay-at-home mother.  She talks about how being a stay at home mom is valued less by academia than other post-college endeavors.  She quotes a writer who said, "Any Harvard Law School degree obtained by a woman who then chooses not to use it in any sort of professional capacity throughout most of her life is a wasted opportunity.  That degree could have gone to a woman who does want to spend her entire life using it to advance the cause of women -- or others in need of advancement -- not simply advancing the lives of her own family at home, which is a noble cause, but not one requiring an elite degree."

[Just to make where I am coming from clear.  I am an un-married, nearly 30, childless woman with a law degree.  I am not now, nor do I really ever see myself being a stay-at-home mom.  I have many friends who are just that, and I have the utmost respect for them.  I have many friends who are working moms and was raised in a family of just about all working women.  I have the utmost respect for them.  And there is not much I hate more than women judging the choices of other women.  Knowing all of that about me, let's continue.]

This article got me thinking. And for me, it came down to the following questions: What did I really get from my law degree?  What was the benefit of those three years of my life?

If the answer to that question is that what I got was the ability to research legal issues and to pass the bar and to get a job in an ivory tower, then maybe the writer would be correct that a law degree was a waste for me if I were to become a stay at home mom.  (Note I said maybe....I still think she's wrong, for the record.)

But as I thought back on the three years of my life that were spent in law school, I came up with two lessons that I think make up the true value of my law degree.  Fortunately for me, what I got from law school was so much more than learning the elements of a contract or the Rule Against Perpetuities or knowing how to cite a law review article in proper Blue Book format.  I learned to respect people with different beliefs and values and learned to believe in myself.  Maybe they didn't teach those things at Harvard, but they surely did at the University of New Mexico.

I learned to respect--and to love--people with different beliefs and values.  In law school, I met my first friend--now one of my very best friends--who was Jewish and my first friend who was Atheist and my first friend who was Muslim.  I went to a Hanukkah party and sat Shiva after a Jewish funeral and stood up as a bridesmaid in a wedding under a chuppah.  I made friends with political views that are absolutely polar opposite from my own.  I made friends from different countries and different races and from completely different backgrounds than my own.  And you know what?  The people who I met are amazingly smart and kind and passionate.  They are generous and giving and trying to make the world a better place.  They fight for the poor and against injustice and promote peace.  I love them all.  I don't care if we don't see eye to eye on an issue or if we pray to different Gods or if we never vote for the same presidential candidate.  I learned that people are people, and that good people are good people.  Is that lesson any less relevant for someone who is a stay at home mom?  Absolutely not.  In fact, perhaps it is more relevant for someone who is instilling beliefs and values into the next generation.

In three years of working my butt off to do well, also I learned to believe in myself.  My first semester, I spent most of my time in a panic.  Worried that I was not smart enough.  I was not good enough.  I could not work hard enough.  I knew that when grades came out in January, I would probably fail, lose my scholarship, and have to figure out a new plan for my life.  I was so worried, in fact, that the day we were handed the sheet of paper with grades on them, I left the building to open mine because I was so certain the news would be bad.  But it wasn't.  And at that point, law school taught me to believe in myself.  To believe in my abilities.  To believe that I was as worthy to be there as all of the brilliant people sitting next to me.  That led me to apply for a job in San Francisco that was way out of my league, which led to the best summer of my life.  That led me to a great 4 years at a law firm in Albuquerque where even more important that the great legal experience I got, I met some of the smartest people I know.  That led me to apply for my dream job that landed me in Texas this June.  Is it any less important for a stay-at-home mom to believe in herself or her abilities than it is for a lawyer at a white-shoe law firm in a big city to do so?  Clearly, the answer has to be no.

In the end, my point is this.  Someday, if I were to decide to stay home and raise babies, would my law degree be wasted on me rather than some high powered litigator?  Would it have been a waste of my time to learn to respect other people and to learn to believe in myself?  Not hardly.  And we should never do anything to discourage women--our sisters and friends and daughters--from furthering their education.  What the world needs is more intelligent, caring, understanding, passionate women.  Whether they be in high powered offices or at home changing diapers.