Valentine's Day Thoughts

“I was smiling yesterday,I am smiling today and I will smile tomorrow.  Simply because life is too short to cry for anything.”  ~ Santosh Kalwar, Quote Me Everyday

We've got a three-part blog of random, unrelated thoughts for Valentine's Day today.

First, as I think I have probably said every year since I've had this blog, Valentine's Day always makes me think of my sweet friend First Valentine.  He was quite the gift giver circa 1995 and the 5th grade.  I mean candy and teddy bears and a homemade card (that I still keep and is seriously one of my most treasured items from grade school).  Plus he always wrote me notes in class and held my hand on the playground.  He set this girl's expectations pretty high even in the 5th grade.  You've read before about how those are still my favorite memories of Valentine's Day.  He would have been 29 a couple of weeks ago, so February always makes me think of the great memories that I have of him.  I sure do miss that kid.

Second, I'm going back to my soapbox from last year about how instead of being all depressed and whining about not having a boyfriend, single girls should spend today appreciating the love that they do have in their lives.  Last year, I deemed this Love in My Life Awareness Day.  I'm sticking with that today, and I am beyond grateful for all of the people who love me.

Third, in keeping with my single lady tradition, I bought myself a Valentine's Day gift.  For the last couple of years, said gift has been a fun pair of shoes.  You know...zebra stilletos or bright red pumps.  But this year I changed it up a big and got myself a decorative sign to hang in my kitchen.  I saw this last week at my friend's house and seriously freaked out.  I rushed home and had this baby headed to my own kitchen within an hour.  What is it, you ask?

Is that not the funniest thing that you've ever seen?  I just love it....Happy Valentine's Day to me!  And to First Valentine in Heaven.  And to all of you!

Another Year, Another Lenten Reflection

"Focus on the small, fervent, open-ended commitments that will allow you to be a receptacle rather than a mover-and-a-shaker; an instrument as opposed to a walking list of holy to-dos."  ~ND Friend

It was hard for me to decide what to give up for Lent this year.  Being the Type-A list maker that I am, I made a list of options:  Chocolate.  Sweets.  Cheese.  Cursing.  Television.  Blogs.  Facebook.  Texting.

And then, the rationalizer and worrier in me started:  Well, wait, what about March Madness.  Okay, so television except for March Madness.  Well what about at the gym?  I can't run with my eyes closed.  Okay, Facebook.  Crap, what about Uncle Black Belt's stories on Facebook that I need for the book?  No good.  All blogs.  But, my friends have blogs.  That's how I keep up with their lives.  Texting.  I spend a lot of time doing that.  Seriously, how am I going to ignore texts when they come in?  And I have friends having babies for crying out loud!  Cheese.  That's fattening.  I am probably going to be having a couple of going away dinners and that food will have cheese in them.  And sometimes, a well placed four letter word is quite effective.

By this point, I was completely stressed out and ready to just throw my hands up in the air.

Enter in ND Friend and this amazing blog that she wrote last week.  She pretty much spoke right to my legalistic, list-making self.  And told me to knock it off.

As she reminded me, Lent isn't about lists, or technicalities, or giving up the most things.  It's not about eating fish on Fridays (which I refuse to do... vegetarianism for a day it is!) or whether the definition of "sweet" indeed includes breakfast pastries.  Sure, all of these things can be effective tools to accomplish the purpose of Lent, but they are not the purpose in and of themselves.

The purpose of Lent is to share in the suffering of Jesus.  To remember what happened 2000 years ago on a hill called Golgatha.  To focus our minds and prepare our hearts for the horror of Good Friday and the celebration of Easter Sunday.  No list is going to do that.

And so, I threw out the list.  I have chosen a couple of things that I have given up with a purpose and I intend to read the Lenten reflections given to me by Mrs. Hepburn.  But I'm not going to panic over trying to be the best Lent-er.  I am going to do my very best to focus on the purpose of the next 40 days.  Essentially, this Lent, I am making ND Friend's prayer my own.  That I may be an instrument, rather than a holy to-do list.  Amen.

Why you have to go for it....

"Begin doing what you want to do now. We are not living in eternity. We have only this moment, sparkling like a star in our hand and melting like a snowflake." ~Francis Bacon, Sr.

Since you all now know about the major life changes that I have headed my way, I thought I'd share some of the articles and quotes that helped me make the decision to shake things up.  Sometimes you just need that little push to make something big happen!  So here are some of the inspiring things that I've come across over the past month or so.

1.  WHY You Have to GO For It. RIGHT. EFFING. NOW. You guys have to read this article.  HAVE to.  Here's my favorite part:

"Because we get ONE shot at this. Just one. And when you’re a weathered 70 year old lady you can peruse the pictures on your wall, and read through your life resume and have something to be proud of. You can say that you slid into home base worn out, scuffed up, and with a killer wrap sheet. All the people I’ve known who have passed away never wished that they worked harder at their jobs. They wished that they had made their passions and the people they love more of a priority."

2.  I haven't seen the movie from which this quote comes, but I love the quote.

3.  What if money was no object?

"What would you do if money was no object?  What would you do to really enjoy your life?  You do that, and forget the money."

"Better to have a short life that is full of what you like doing, than a short life lived in a miserable way."

4.  This quote, which I find sort of soothing in some way.

Photo via

5.  This idea, which makes me grateful for the brave people in my life!

Photo via



You Win 29. You Win.

"In terms of days and moments lived, you’ll never again be as young as you are right now, so spend this day, the youth of your future, in a way that deflects regret. Invest in yourself. Have some fun. Do something important. Love somebody extra. In one sense, you’re just a kid, but a kid with enough years on her to know that every day is priceless."  ~Victoria Moran

Sometimes, a girl just has to admit defeat.  This weekend, being 29 years old got the best of me.  But I did my best to put up a fight.

On Friday night, one of my favorite Red Dirt bands--Bart Crow Band--was playing here in town. 



What better way to celebrate my big news than some Red Dirt music, some dancing and some awesome friends?

Me and College Roomie

Chef Friend, Pharmer Girl, Me and Little Miss Texico

But, alas, I'm pretty sure I came off like an old lady.  A minimum of 10 times I said, "Does it have to be SO loud?"  And then I had multiple conversations about how if we could all just wear our pjs to the bar and they had couches for us to sit on, I would come more often.  Little Miss Texico agreed and said, "Yea, and no make up either, that would even the playing field."  That comment?  That's why we are friends.  And even though I made it the majority of the night without it, before we left I admit to eating multiple Tums out of my purse.  Seriously, I'm 80 years old.  Had I been complaining about my hip and planning on playing bridge today, you would have thought I was straight off of Golden Girls.

However, the concert was great, the dancing was good, and the people watching was the best.  My favorite part?  When Pharmer Girl's friend, Miss Artesia, was talked into asking Travis Briscoe to dance.  Part of the convincing involved the promise of a shout out on my blog.  It's possible I was a total creeper with a camera during this whole experience. 

The result/  He says he doesn't dance (potentially because he has a wife, which we learned from Little Brother later in the night) but that his dad would love to.  Miss Artesia thought she could do without that.  Ha!

And so even though I was tired for the next two days (and may have not gotten out of my pjs the next day), I had a blast on Friday night and I'm so grateful to have such fun people in my life.  And for Red Dirt music.  Obviously.

Family Farm Friday #77: Livestock Raises Kids

I saw a quote last week that contained the following phrase, "Livestock raises kids."

Thinking back on my childhood, I couldn't agree more.  I don't know that I remember a day of my childhood that didn't involve an animal.  Horses, cows, sheep, pigs, dogs.....you name it.  Those animals were as much a part of raising me as were the people who I had around me (and those were some pretty darn good people!)

Livestock teaches kids so many lessons.  Responsibility.  Compassion.  Death.  Work ethic.  Friendship.  Where you food comes from.  Birds and the bees.  Managing finances.  Winning and losing.

Whether it was the old ewe that my Mom called Whisper, or the dog whose name was my first word, or a pig named Small Fry who would fall over on the ground if you scratched his belly, or any one of a whole litany of horses I could list by name (Baldy, Smokey, Baby Doll, Frosty, Chief, Blaze, Badger), or one of the show lambs of whom my parents may have more photos on display in the house than of their children....

....those animals raised this kid.  And I'd like to think they did a pretty good job.

The One Where I Drop a Bomb (or Four)

Well, friends, I've got a change or two happening in my life at the moment.  And for a girl who is completely, 100% change averse, this sort of scares the crap out of me.

I have given notice and am quitting my job.

I am moving to Texas to start what might just be my dream job.

I'm selling my condo and buying a house (hopefully!).

And I sort of got asked on a date...

My Lord God...

“Faith don't come in a bushel basket, Missy. It come one step at a time. Decide to trust Him for one little thing today, and before you know it, you find out He's so trustworthy you be putting your whole life in His hands.” ~ Lynn Austin, Candle in the Darkness


I think that I have posted the prayer below before...it's one of my favorites.  But it seems pretty fitting for me right now, so I figured that I'd share it again in case it's applicable to your life as well.  Happy Thursday!

Photo by me - New York City - 2006

MY LORD GOD, 

I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road, though I may know nothing about it. Therefore I will trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.

- Thomas Merton, "Thoughts in Solitude"

She Did What She Could

"People who really want to make a difference in the world usually do it, in one way or another. And I’ve noticed something about people who make a difference in the world: They hold the unshakable conviction that individuals are extremely important, that every life matters. They get excited over one smile. They are willing to feed one stomach, educate one mind, and treat one wound. They aren’t determined to revolutionize the world all at once; they’re satisfied with small changes. Over time, though, the small changes add up. Sometimes they even transform cities and nations, and yes, the world.” ~Beth Clark

Sometimes it's overwhelming to see all that's wrong with the world.  War and hunger, homelessness and disease.  Hatred and division.  School shootings and kidnappings and senseless murders.  It can feel hopeless--like nothing we can do will make any difference.

Jesus must have known that things would get that way.  Remember the story of Mary Magdalene who broke her alabaster jar and washed Jesus' feet with her hair?  And when the disciples criticized her, how did Jesus respond?  He defended her, saying simply, "She did what she could."

That might be my favorite story in the entire Bible.  A woman who was looked down upon.  She had only one thing to give to Jesus, and so she gave it.  She did what she could.  And that was enough.

Photo by me - Loretto Chapel - 2012

Giving what we can.  That's all any of us can do.  If we look at all of the things that we can't do, or if we compare what we can do with the things that other people can do.....well that's where we run into problems.

If, instead, we realize that, like Mary Magdalene, we are simply called to do what we can, that's where the little things can make a difference. Mother Teresa understood this, and she said, “Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.”

We can be kind to our neighbors.  We can donate what we are able to the hungry.  We can pray for the lonely.  We can bake a casserole when someone is going through a hard time (particularly if we're from the South).  We can give our time to worthwhile causes.  And while these may be little things, perhaps that is not where the story ends.

A priest put it best at the end of a homily I heard last week when he said, "I trust that if we do the little things that we can do, and if we do them with great love, God will turn these little things into great things." 

Amen to that.

30 by 30 Report: Month 3

“In the autumn of your years don't make it so that what you look back on is regret. Live your life now so that whatever you do gives some sunshine before you head into the winter of your life.”  ~Stephen Richards

Another month down....which means that I'm a quarter of the way through with this project (and a quarter of a year closer to 30!)  I thought that I was pretty darn productive this month and I'm excited to share these things with y'all!  If you're new to the blog, you can see my complete 30 by 30 list here!

#1:  Cook 10 new recipes.  (7/10 completed).

This month I knocked out three new recipes.  You read before about two of them...Baked Potato Soup and Protein Packed Banana Nut Bread.  But that's not all, folks! 

I also made a Cabbage Roll Soup that was seriously amazing and packed full of veggies.  Here's the recipe.  I left out the onion and added some cauliflower.  You could really put in any additional veggies that you wanted to.  It was perfect for a cold day!

#4:  Check 5 items off my bucket list.  (1/5 completed).

Don't you love me cross referencing other lists?  Monica from Friends would be proud.

What was the bucket list checkmark I got this month?  Well I submitted a couple of articles to a magazine.  ND Friend got me a subscription to Seeing the Everyday, which is the most adorable magazine ever.  They invite contributions from readers, so I ended up sending a couple of my prior blogs.  So far I've not heard anything back, and they probably have far better options, but I submitted those babies and got my checkmark.

On a sidenote, ND Friend's sister, Super Mom, has been doing an Everyday inspired project with her boys every week and it's seriously the cutest thing you've ever seen.  Check it out on her blog here.

#5:  Get a draft of Uncle Black Belt's book put together.  (.25 completed)

This is really more of just a progress report to let you know that Uncle Black Belt and I (along with a few other family members who have kindly agreed to supply info) are working away.  What exactly is this book, you ask?  Well, it's basically Uncle Black Belt's memoir from his year spent as an army officer in Vietnam.  It's gleamed from his journals, letters that he wrote home to his family, and memories of him and his sisters.  And, well because I think you guys will enjoy this and we could use a little encouragement, here are a couple of snippets from the book.

I'm not too sure why we hunt to kill other human beings...

I still can’t get used to the idea of killing people, but it’s you or them, and this is one boy who’s gonna make it home.  

Send some snapshots of yall and some koolaid.  This water tastes worse than buffalo pee.

I’ve never really thought or done much praying, but when the first bullet went over my head, I started.  

I'm sending you this letter at school because I'm not sure mom should see it.

Out of eleven of us, eight were wounded and three died.  The last I remembered was my radio operator James STOKLEY helping put me on the medivac to the field hospital. 

Okay....who wants to pre-order?  Pretty heavy stuff, right?

I don't know how this thing can't be a best seller.  Uncle Black Belt sent me this message last week, which made all of this worth it, even if this book never sells a single copy:  "Tiffany, I want to thank you for taking on the task of writing this book. The memories that have come back to me about the good times have done more to help me than all the crazy Doctors at the VA."  

Turns out that this little goal had a much larger purpose than I thought.

#7:  Read 24 new books.  (7/24 completed).

In January, I actually read three books, which you heard all about in this prior blog.  Usually it's a struggle for me to get through two, but the fact that I could not put The Fault In Our Stars and spent like 4 hours one afternoon just reading helped to speed things along.

#8:  Send my friends little gifts once a month.  (3/12 completed).

 

For January's gift project, I decided to try my hand at making some hand stamped candles that I'd seen on Pinterest and some other blogs.  Summary:  Cute, but not really worth the effort (unless you have a really good stamp collection and a lot of time).

So I just bought white (coconut scented) candles from Target, some cute stamps and ink from Hob Lob, some tissue paper, and some wax paper.  You just stamp your design onto the tissue paper and set that on the candle.  Then you put wax paper over it (wax side down...that matters I found out!) and hold a hairdryer over it for maybe a minute.  The wax paper melts to the candle and your design sticks.  Pretty simple!

I decided to make two candles and to turn this into a little themed gift box. 

The first candle said, "All you really need is a friend with chocolate" so that gift box turned into a chocolate fest and got sent to ND Friend.

The second one said, "Life is about using all the crayons in the box."  I wanted to send this to Teacher Friend (thought it was appropriate for a teacher) and decided to include a coloring book and crayons for her sweet little girl in the gift box.

Pretty simple, inexpensive project and I think the girls enjoyed their gifts!

#9:  Eat in 10 new restaurants. (3/10 completed)

Well this month a little trip to College Station got me two new restaurants to check off the list.  Holy moly....both of these were amazing.  The first was Veritas, which is a little wine bistro.  I had a steak, mashed potatoes and squash and it was to.die.for.  Seriously, so good.  The next day I had lunch at Cafe Eccell and was just as impressed.  I had a bowl of corn chowder which was seriously SO good and a chopped salad that was even better.  It was like they put all good things in life in that salad and served it up on a plate.  If you're in College Station, I'd highly recommend trying both of these places!

#15:  Go to church every day for a week.  (Completed.)

Photo via me - Switzerland - 2009

I was really excited to check this item off the list, and I figured that there was no better way to start the year off than by going to church every day for a week.  And so I started on December 31 and went to church every day.  7 days, 5 churches.  And I loved it.  As much as I'm not a morning person, I think my favorite might have been 6:30 am mass in a cold, quiet, dark church.  It was just so beautiful and peaceful and the perfect start to my morning.  I would highly recommend this for anyone to try, I just can't tell you how much I enjoyed this experience, and even since then I've been going to church at least one "regular day" a week in addition to Sunday.

#29:  Bring home a bouquet of flowers once a month.  (3/12 completed).

Friday Book Club: January Books

Well my 2013 reading list started out with a bang.  Not only did I read three, count them, THREE books this month (it's a record) but I loved each and every one of them!  I hope the rest of the books I've got on my to read shelf for this year are going to turn out this well!  Linking up with Friday Book Club today to share my January reads with y'all.

A Million Miles in a Thousand Years by Donald Miller

Well you already know that I loved this book because the author, Don Miller, is friends with my boy Bob Goff.  Sigh.  Some guys have all the luck.  Anyway, this book is all about Don's life and how instead of just floating by while sitting on his couch, eating pizza and playing video games, he decided to intentionally live a life that would make a good story.  And that changed everything.  It was a great book--easy read, inspirational, and he's got a great sense of humor.  Here were a few of my favorite quotes.

"The truth is, if what we chose to do with our lives won't make a story meaningful, it won't make a life meaningful either."

"What I'm saying is I think life is staggering and we're just used to it.  We all are like spoiled children no longer impressed with the gifts we're given--it's just another sunset, just another rainstorm moving over the mountain, just another child being born, just another funeral."

"Did I really believe God could write a better story?  And if I did, why didn't I trust Him?"

"It is when people do not allow God to show up through them, that the world collapses in on itself."

"There is a force resisting the beautiful things in the world, and too many of us are giving in."

"The ambitions we have will become the stories we live."

"The story made us different characters than we would have been if we had skipped the story and shown up at the ending a different way."

"I think about the hard lives so many people have had, the sacrifices they've endured, and how those people will see Heaven differently than those of us who have had easier lives."

"What I really remember are the few times we made an extra effort to do something memorable."

"We don't know how much we are capable of loving until the people we love are being taken away, until a beautiful story is ending."

The Fault in Our Stars by John Green

Holy cow, guys.  I could not put this book down.  And I mean, I spend over three hours one Sunday reading  all but the first 50 pages (which I read the night before).  This is a sort of miracle for a girl like me who is not a fast reader and who has a super short attention span.  And because it was a fiction book, which I basically just don't read.  But this book, well, it was amazing.  I don't want to give too much away, but it's a love story about two teenagers with cancer.  I know, I know, that sounds sappy and pre-teeny, and Taylor Swift-ish.  I promise that it's not.  It was awesome.  So awesome, that I gave it the coveted and illusive 5 ranking on my Goodreads.  That don't just happen, folks.  Buy it.  Read it.  Love it.  Thank me later.

Seven by Jen Hatmaker

College Roomie got me this book for my birthday and she.did.good.  I absolutely loved this book!  In fact, I liked it so much that I've already had it sent to two other people--Dr. Kyra and Cousin SameMiddleName because I thought they would enjoy it as well.  The basic idea is that the author decides to rebel against excess and focuses on something different each month....from food to media to stuff....and she chronicles her journey.  You'll love this book.  Jen Hatmaker is hilarious.  I mean completely hilarious.  She reminds me a lot of ND Friend, who is one of the funniest people I know.  (You do have to overlook a couple of pages of hippy nonsense where she gets all free range, no antibiotic anti-ag preaching, but other than that, I had no complaints!)

Jesus, may there be less of me and my junk and more of You and Your kingdom.

I want to live gratefully, humbly, hopefully.

For whatever reason I was born into privilege; I've never known hunger, poverty, or despair.  I have been blessed, blessed, blessed--relationally, emotionally, spiritually, and physically.  My life is so happy it's almost embarrassing.

I won't defile my blessings by imagining that I deserve them.

Until every human receives the dignity I casually enjoy, I pray my heart aches with tension and my belly rumbles for injustice.

I have come to see tha tthe great tragedy in the church is not that the rich Christians do not care about the poor, but that the rich Christians do not know the poor.  I long for the Calcutta slums to meet the Chicago suburbs, for lepers to meet landowners and for each to see God's image in the other.  I truly believe that when the poor meet hte rich, riches will have no meaning.  And when the rich meet the poor, we will see poverty come to an end.  (Quoting Shane Claiborne)

Obedience Isn't a lack of fear.  It's just doing it scared.

In a culture of hero worship and conspicuous rainmakers, this concept struggles to emerge, but the story of God's people comprises a billion little moments when an average believer pressed on, carried through, stepped up.  In the quantity of ordinary obedience, the kingdom truly advances.

The discomfort is where the magic happens.

What would the early chruch think if they walked into some of our buildings today? .. They'd wonder if we had read the Bible, or worry it had been tampered with since their time.

Sometimes vigils are for waiting, when your struggle has been voiced and God's hand hasn't moved.