That Time My Plane Almost Crashed

"What's right and good doesn't come naturally. You have to stand up and fight for it -- as if the cause depends on you, because it does." ~Bill Moyers

I have some bad luck with airplanes.  I'm delayed seriously all.the.time.  There was the attempted hijacking in Costa Rica.  And the emergency landing in Kansas.  But the little adventure that I dealt with last Thursday takes the cake.

So there I was, on a flight from Dallas to Amarillo for Cousin Whitney's wedding.  It was a 45 minute flight and The Boy from Texas and Sister Lisa were going to pick me up at the airport.  About 30 minutes into the flight, they turn on the seatbelt sign and say that there was a little storm.  So there was a bit of standard turbulence, no big deal. 

Well when it was about time to land, all hell (sorry, Bible Belt Moms) broke loose.  It seriously was like that movie Flight when the plane is crashing and the pilot has no control over it.  It was jerking every which way, dropping in a free fall then pulling up.  At one point it was completely sideways--like wing pointed at the ground--and they had to jerk it back around.  It seriously felt like the pilots had zero control and that something was wrong with the plane.  People were screaming.  Overhead bins were coming open.  The toilet somehow broke during all of this, so it smelled like sewer.  It was horrible.  So then we ended up going back up in the air and making a circle to try again. 

So, I pretty much resigned myself to the fact that the plane was going to crash.  Like, seriously, decided I was going to die in a plane crash. I put on a calming song on my iPod (Heavenly Day).  I prayed a lot.   I also found the safety information card to be sure I knew how the overhead exit worked in case I somehow survived and needed out.  (Listen, I'm practical even in a panic.)  But I was really upset when got to thinking how my untimely plane crash death was really going to ruin Cousin Whitney's wedding.  That's the mark of a good maid of honor, kids.

Anyway, back to the story.  Mind you, we know nothing at this point, we had no idea it was weather and not something wrong with the plane, we had no idea that the pilot tried to land the plane three times and could not get it stable enough to come down, we had no idea that we were running out fuel and he had to decide whether to try a 4th time to land or divert to Lubbock, but that we didn't have enough to do both things.  Finally, the pilot comes on in a voice that sounded pretty shook up, and says he apologizes, that we never should have had to experience that, he is sorry, and that we will be diverting to Lubbock and landing in 10 minutes.  By the time he put the plane on the ground, I was crying and my hands were shaking so bad that I couldn't hold my phone to text.  Yea.....it was that bad.

Anyway, we're in Lubbock and the airport is already closed, lights off, like 3 people still there kind of closed.  So they hold us on the plane, and the pilot announces that we will "try" to go back to Amarillo and land and we will "hope" that it's not as a bad as the last experience.  Um.....HELL NO (sorry again, Bible Belt Moms).  I was getting of that plane.  So I went to the front and told them I wanted off in Lubbock.  I was told that was not an option.

And then, I went to the lawyer voice. I threw out words like "false imprisonment" and "wrongful death" and threatened to sue American Airlines.  Not 3 minutes later, I was told they would allow me to get off the plane and were getting me (and anyone else who wanted off) a police escort.  So me and one other guy with half a brain got off the plane at 11:30 pm.

My dear friend JB got a text from me at that time asking her to come to the airport.  Being one of those small town Eastern NM kids who is always game to help out a friend, she came, picked me up, and headed towards Amarillo.  Her friend, Bracket, came along with us and told me several hilarious stories about him flying on airplanes, which helped to ease the tension a great deal.  I like that Bracket kid.

Me and JB at the Color Run---it was the only picture I could find.

The Boy From Texas and Sister Lisa, by the way, had headed towards Lubbock the second he found out that was where we landed.  I asked him what he would have done if they wouldn't let me off the plane.  He said that he had zero doubt that I would talk my way off that airplane.  Kinda made me like him even more, that rationale.

So anyway, I end up back in Amarillo at 1:30 in the morning thanks to my rescue squad.  What about the rest of the nimrods who stayed on the plane?  They sat on the runway in Lubbock, on that death trap of a plane that smelled like sewer for THREE HOURS and did not get back to Amarillo until 3 am.

I now have a whole new respect for people who are scared to fly.  I've never been afraid, but I have to tell you that I was a bit of mess crawling on a plane to come home on Sunday evening.  Fortunately, I had a perfectly normal flight and am hoping that having been back on the horse (as we country folk say) will end this crazy fear of crashing.

Oh, and for the record, my three years of law school were worth it just to have the ability to talk my way off of that plane alone.  I'm about 96% sure that there was not a false imprisonment claim against American Airlines, but you best believe I was glad to have that term to throw around come Thursday at 11:25 pm!  Thank you, UNM School of Law!