Happiness Project Month 2: Improving Marriage

“Don't rely on someone else for your happiness and self worth. Only you can be responsible for that. If you can't love and respect yourself - no one else will be able to make that happen. Accept who you are - completely; the good and the bad - and make changes as YOU see fit - not because you think someone else wants you to be different.” ~Stacy Charter

I've finished up the second month of my Happiness Project. As I mentioned previously, the author, Gretchen Rubin's, second month was dedicted to increasing the happiness in her marriage. I don't have one of those, so I had to improvise.

I decided this month's project would be to do something totally for myself. I thought about different things that I could do that would make me happy, and settled on.....drumroll please.....

Golf Lessons!

Now, you have to understand a few things.

First off, my only golf experience has been with BFF and one of the Animal House boys from college. We would go to the driving range, or to the cheap golf course in Stillwater and play periodically. They are both pretty decent, I was just starting. So, they "helped" me learn. I distinctly remember BFF screaming at me one day and saying, "Tiffany, you're just swinging like a girl!" I threw down the club and yelled back, "BFF, I AM A GIRL!" (I've mentioned before that our relationship is like this....) Anyway, the point is, I have never really had great instruction.

Second, golf can be really frustrating. I'm pretty athletic. Usually I can pick up any ball or bat or racket and hold my own. It drives me crazy to go to the driving range and see fat old dudes or little kids who are way better than me. But it happened every time I went! So....golf lessons seemed necessary.

I called up a golf course here in town and signed up for 5 lessons. Here is a brief play-by-play of the two so far.

Lesson 1:

Not going to lie, my main concern was what to wear. I mean, perception is reality, so I wanted to at least look like I fit in on the driving range. After NO help from BFF or Cousin Kevin, who were both annoyed I would even ask this question, I headed to my lesson. I met up with my coach on the driving range and we went to work. The first thing he says is, "Let's videotape you and see how your swing looks." My response was, "Hold up there pal, let's start with you showing me how to hold a club and go from there." He quickly understood and put the video camera away for another day!

So we started with the basics. When I was finally ready to swing, I hit the ball on the first try (yay for small victories!) and he assured me that I was in good shape and that I had a "very athletic swing." This was like music to my ears.

My only complaint about the first lesson is that it was too hot. I went at 10:30 on a Saturday morning and it was miserable. It felt like I was doing hot golf instead of hot yoga. Lesson learned--go first thing at night or first thing in the morning from now on!

Lesson 2:

This time, I decided that a lesson in the evenings might be a good idea. For the girls following the blog interested in fashion, I rocked my favorite orange Tommy sleeveless polo (see above). Anyway, this time, the golf coach insisted on filming. This just about gave me a panic attack. It was a flashback to law school Evidence & Trial Practice class where the teacher videoed you doing practice arguments and questioning witnesses, then made you watch yourself. I learned quickly that I hated my hair and the sound of my own voice on video.

Luckily, my golf swing faired better on tape. We watched the video, the golf coach made a few corrections to my swing (like the fact that I didn't release the club so my hands were backwards on the follow through--something that one of the boys should have realized had they not been so busy yelling at me!). So I've improved quite a bit thus far. I can now hit the ball fairly consistantly about 100 yards or so with a 7 iron. I feel that to be success for now.

All in all, I think golf lessons have increased my happiness level. It's fun to be outside in the sun, fresh air and quiet on a golf course. It's relaxing and sort of theraputic to be able to hit something with a club. It's also nice to have been able to set a goal to work toward, and to do something that really is just for me.

And, last but not least, it doesn't hurt that my golf coach is a couple years older than me, not married, and pretty cute....stay tuned to see where this goes.

Facing Our Fears

"Have you ever looked fear in the face and said I just don't care?" ~Pink, Glitter In The Air

We all have fears. And no matter how different they may be, we all have to struggle and figure out how to face them. That's hard, because it's hard for our friends to understand fears that they don't have. Don't get me wrong, they can be supportive, but they can't really understand.

For example, I have a friend who is scared of horses. As much as I want to understand and support my friend, it's really hard for me, becuase I don't understand her fear. To me, it's irrational and she needs to just hop on a horse because I know she'll be fine. But she doesn't know that, and for her, the fear is real.

I was talking about this with some friends last week. All of them assure me that some of my fears are completely irrational, probably more irrational that the fear of riding a horse. They don't understand it, but for me, it's a problem.
That's the thing about having a fear---it's not a rational thing. If it were, overcoming it would be easy. You would just calm down, think rationally, and do whatever it is you are afraid of. If only it were that easy.

I think the key to overcoming a fear (as cliche as this sounds) is figuring out exactly what the fear is. Once you know what you are worried about, you can figure out how to deal with it and work through it. Then, I think you take baby steps toward the ultimate goal. Finally, at some point, you have to face the fear head on. Once you've done that, the odds are, the fear will go away and you will understand why your friends thought you were crazy.

The bottom line is this.....at some point, you just have to hop on the horse, hang on tight, and see what happens!

When Did That Happen??

"We're adults....when did this happen? And how do we make it stop?" ~Meredith Grey, Grey's Anatomy

College Roomie and I were talking on the phone last week about boys, which I will admit, is a frequent topic of conversation. I had this huge realization during the conversation, so I thought I'd share.

Early on in the conversation she asked if I would be willing to date a 40 year old. Not that she had one in mind, but just in general. I said that yes, I would, if he was the right 40 year old I didn't see that being much of a problem, and told her about a 40 year old friend I have who seems much closer to my own age. Later, she mentioned that she knew a nice guy, but that he was only 18. I laughed and said, "I'd be much more likely to date a 40 year old than an 18 year old."

And then it was like a lightbulb went off.... "Wait a minute," I said, "When in the world did that happen??"

Apparently I became a grown up! At some point in the last 8 years, that opinion changed without me even realizing it. I am sure when I was 18 this was not the case at all. Isn't it crazy that we grow up and make these sort of subconscious decisions without even knowing? I didn't sit down one day and say to myself, "Okay Tiffany, it's time to be an adult now." It seems like it just sort of happened somewhere in the midst of the every day-ness of life.

I certainly think this is a good thing, and I am glad to realize that I'm growing up. I was less glad to notice the little wrinkles forming around my eyes. That, however, is another blog for another day!

Family Farm Friday #21: We're All In This Together

"People who work together will win, whether it be against complex football defenses, or the problems of modern society." ~Vince Lombardi

This probably seems pretty obvious, but there are lots of different products raised by the American farm and ranch. Obviously there are different types of livestock like cattle and sheep, and different types of crops like corn and barley. But there are also different methods of raising them, like grass fed beef or organic produce. While we may not all agree on the best practices, we are all involved in agriculture. And agriculture has to stick together.
One of the things that drives me crazy is when producers turn against each other. Recently, another blog did a great job of explaining this exact issue. Here's my favorite quote from that blog.

"It doesn’t do anyone any good to vilify the type of beef our neighbor raises. It doesn’t matter what type of food you are raising, if you have to make up scary stories and spew misinformation about other products in order to promote your own, then you have a problem."

I think that the blogger hit the nail right on the head. There are too many activist groups out there spreading inaccurate "facts" and false information about agriculture. When we join in with them in this endeavor, they win. They gain yet another voice, and the public is even more likely to listen to what farmers and ranchers have to say, because we are the ones who know the industry. So my point is twofold. First off, we all need to support and promote American agriculture. Period. Second, although we obviously want to promote our own product, we need to do that by PROMOTING OUR product, rather than bashing someone elses.

We have more than enough people attacking agriculture, it's our job to stand up and fight for it.

Throwback Thursday # 26: Tornado Season

“If you wait to do everything until you're sure it's right, you'll probably never do much of anything.” ~Win Borden

My friend, who we'll call Flinstone, drives me crazy. Twice in the last month I've call him and asked what he as doing. His response? Out driving around in a van chasing tornadoes. Last weekend as we were talking he seriously asked the driver if he could see at all through the storm they were in the middle of. I had to hang up. It was too stressful for me. Boys!

Anyway, it got me to thinking about one of the tornado warnings that happened when I was in college at Oklahoma State. Somehow, I managed to make it through 3 years of living in Oklahoma without ever being in a serious tornado. This is probably why I can write a blog that is on the lighter side of the tornado issue.

One night, College Roomie were at our apartment when the tornado sirens went off. Although we really are both pretty calm, cool and collected most of the time, we went into freakout mode. We had no idea what one was supposed to do when there was a tornado. So, we did the only thing that made sense. We called one of the Animal House boys, our dear friend, Trailerpark Bryan.

See, Trailerpark Bryan (and yes, that's what we call him in real life, not just on the blog) is from Oklahoma. He also knows pretty much everything about everything. He was the kind of guy who could help you program a tv, fix a car window, repair any appliance you could think of....you get the picture. Anyway, Trailerpark Bryan tells us that the best thing to do is to get a matress and put it in the bathtub. If the tornado hit, we could get in the tub under the matress.

College roomie and I spring into action. We discover a slight problem. Our queen size matresses will not fit into the bathroom. So, being the resourseful ladies we are, we get all of the couch cushions and haul them into the tub instead. Then we decide that we should probably be sure we could both fit, in case this actually came to fruition. So here we are, both sitting in the bathtub, covered in couch cushions, preparing for the worst.

Well, once we decide that the dress rehearsal was sufficiently complete, we went outside to see what was going on. Now, growing up, I'd seen several tornadoes forming in the skies over my house before, but I'd never been in a situation where one was actually touching down. It's eerie.....the sky is sort of green and it's really quiet. While out in the street with the tornado sirens blaring, we decided that snapping a picture of the event was necessary.

As you might guess, the tornado did not hit our little apartment at Casa Mia that night. As I recall it ended up going south of town. We chalked this up to experience--we learned three great lessons. First, our matresses would not fit into the bathtub, although both of us and the couch cushions would. Second, Trailerpark Bryan really does know everything. And third, there is always time for a one-armed self portrait.

Loud Barks and Huge Hearts

"A teacher affects eternity; he can never tell where his influence stops." ~Henry Brooks Adams


I've written before about how the agriculture community is a type of family. I can't think of any better example than ag teachers. My ag teacher was certainly like a second father to me and I loved him dearly. I miss him every day.

I also was fortunate to form great relationships ag teachers from other school as well. When you grow up in FFA, you get to know the ag teachers from all over the state, be it at fairs or judging contests or livestock sales.

It's funny--most of them pretty much the same. Great guys with loud barks (although some definitely have bites to go along!) and huge hearts. If you know ag teachers, you know what I mean. It's amazing to see these strong, tough men go from screaming at you for busting a class one day, to tearing up when you win an award the next.


Last week, Las Vegas FFA lost their ag teacher, Mr. Leger, in a car accident. But, in true FFA fashion, this loss was felt far beyond Las Vegas. Facebook statuses were posted by students and teachers from Texico and Los Lunas, Clayton and Deming, San Jon and many more places. Ag teachers, probably more than any other teachers, have an impact on kids, not only in their own schools, but all across New Mexico.

I could not be more grateful to the ag teachers who have impacted my life. Mr. Leger was one of those ag teachers, and I mourn along with his students, family, and the entire New Mexico FFA organization today.

America's Favorite Pastime

"If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there are men on base." ~Dave Barry

I don't particularly like baseball. Cousin Kevin, try to refrain from calling and yelling at me. Read the whole blog first.

I never watched it growing up as a kid on tv. My school had a team, but no one really went to the games. Even now, for me, it's just something that is on ESPN when I'm running at the gym to fill the horrible gap between the end of March Madness and the start of college football season. To me, America's favorit pastime should be college football. Hands down. I realize this probably comes as a shock to no one.

Well, times are changing, thanks to the Salem-Keizer (Oregon) Volcanoes.

Oh, and my super-star relative, Baby Cousin.

Who is really not a baby anymore!

So Baby Cousin was drafted last year right out of high school by the San Francisco Giants. It was super exciting for the family....he's our first pro-athlete.

During the draft we were all glued to our tvs and computer screens. When he was chosen, I was sitting in bar review class, in the back row, with one earphone in listening to the draft while Epstein drawned on and on about Contracts. When they said Baby Cousin's name, I slammed down my pen and ran out into the hall to get on the phone. I never did understand the contracts material I was supposed to learn that day. Thank goodness I didn't fail the bar!

Anyway, last week was Baby Cousin's first minor league exhibition game. He started as pitcher for the Volcanoes. He pithced for 5 innings. I'm excited to report that he had 8 strike-outs and didn't give up a single hit! That's right--he's a super-star! Here's a picture of him at the game.

So fair warning for my non-sports enthusiast followers. You and I will probably both be learning a lot about baseball in the future. Keep following the blog....I have no doubt that one day down the road, I'll be blogging about watching him pitch for the Giants at AT&T Park! You can bet I'll be in the stands.

We are talking about America's favorite past time and all.

Throwback Thursday #25: Happy Father's/Mother's Day

"I don't care if you got me a card. If there's not money in it, I'd just throw it away anyway." ~My Dad discussing his Father's Day present

Well, my dad ruined Father's Day this year. You will all recall the Bull Semen blog. Well, as we were looking through the magazine at bulls, my dad became intrigued with Indian Outlaw. He just thought it might be fun to try him on a couple of red cows to see what would happen.


Little Brother and I had this great idea--we could buy him the Indian Outlaw semen for Father's Day as a surprise! So both of us were telling him not to order it this year, to wait until a couple heifers were ready to breed, that it wasn't a good investment, etc. so that we could get it for him instead.
Well, my dad being the stubborn old man that he is, got mad. He told my mom that his kids couldn't tell him what to do with his money and he bought that semen just to show us. Yea. Nice work, dad.

Anyway, this made me think back to the best Father's Day/Mother's Day present I've given my parents---since this year is clearly not going to be in the running anymore---the clear winner was the time I sent them to prison.

When I lived in San Francisco for the summer, my parents came out to visit. That, in itself, was a miracle of sorts. You see, my parents don't take vacations. Mom hates to fly, dad is always busy with the farming and ranching, and growing up our vacations were the three stock shows every year. But, they came out to spend 3 or 4 days in SF with me.

I decided that for Father's/Mother's Day, I'd send them to Alcatraz.

They loved it! Both of them want to go back to SF and go on the tour again. In fact, when I turned down the job offer in SF, my dad's first comment was, "Well, I was really looking forward to coming back out to visit you and seeing Alcatraz again." (Forget, wow, I'm glad my only daughter will be living 3 hours away instead of 3 states...but whatever).

Anyway, because the bull semen gift was a bust, the Alcatraz trip will continue reining as the best gift. We'll see what we can come up with next year if the old man doesn't get in the way....again.

Dead Flowers

"Nothing could be worse than the fear that one had given up too soon, and left one unexpended effort that might have saved the world." ~Jane Addams

Sadly, I'm not referring to the Miranda Lambert song.

Often when I hear people talking about having kids and what not, I respond with, "That's just crazy. I don't even have a plant! I can barely take care of myself." I always though it was sort of a clever, cute saying. Turns out, it's apparently true.

A few weeks ago, I bought a little box of flowers at Wal-Mart. They were so pretty---bright yellow and orange. So I put them out on my balcony and really enjoyed them......for like two weeks. I have now killed the flowers.

I would like to blame the flowers and say maybe they were really supposed to be planted intead of growing in this little box, although there was no sort of instructions to make that clear. But it's probably a karma thing, really. I always talk about not even being able to take care of a plant, then I bought one and it was destined to die. When I found them dead today (it's been a busy week and I hadn't noticed, okay?), I tried to revive them with water. But, I'm a farm girl. I know they are a lost cause.

So, in an attempt to salvage this situation and convince myself I can take care of a plant, I'm off to the nursery this weekend. I think it may be time for professional assistance. I'll keep you posted.

You might cross your fingers for my next victims......

Starring Role....

"Your supposed to be the leading lady of your own life!" ~Kate Winslet, The Holiday

Have you ever thought about who would play you if there was ever a movie about your life? It's funny how often this issue has come up in the last few weeks. So, I decided a blog in it was probably necessary.
Casting is important, you know. Think about it....let's take Julia Roberts for example. She was born to play Vivian in Pretty Woman. No one else could have played that role.
Some people have it easy.
Keira Knightley is perfect for College Roomie.
SoulMateFriend would be played by Courtney Cox because there are things that my friend says and mannerisms that she has that are exactly like Monica from Friends!
I, on the other hand, have never been able to figure out who should play me. Well last week, I was watching this new show on NBC called Parenthood. (I love the show by the way....the dad is Craig T. Nelson--aka Hayden Fox from Coach!) Anyway, I really like one of the sisters on the show and was thinking, hmmm, maybe she could play me. Then, as the week went on, without me bringing it up, two more people commented on who they thought would play me in a movie.
Anyhow...from this, we have three suggestions.
Drew Barrymore (This suggestion was made while watching her in Charlie's Angels)

Renee Zellweger (This is actually my least favorite. I don't like her because she was mean to Kenny Chesney and her face seems all scrunchy.)
Erika Christensen (This is the girl from Parenthood. She was also the crazy chick in Swim Fan, but I'm trying to pretend that isn't why she could play me.)
So....two questions for the blog readers.
1. Who would play you?
2. Which one of these (or do you have any other suggestions of actresses) should play me?

COMMENT BELOW!

Coach Wooden's Legacy

"Other coaches inspired their charges to be great basketball players. Wooden inspired them to be great men." ~Jake Simpson, sportswriter

Last week, legendary basketball coach John Wooden passed away at 99. The media coverage intrigued me.

Of course, they talked about his UCLA basketball teams and discussed how he became known as the "Wizzard of Westwood." But so many people would simply comment, almost in passing, on the fact that he was a great coach. And, of course, he was. 10 National Championships in 12 years and an 88 game winning-streak prove that.

But last week, much more time was spent talking about what a great person he was. They talked about the life lessons he taught players. About his own moral convictions--like refusing to ever utter a curse word. They talked about the impact he had on people's lives. As far as legacies go, this likely matters more in the end.

I read a great article listing the Top Ten quotes from Coach Wooden. I thought I'd share.

10. "It's what you learn after you know it all that counts."

9. "Talent is God-given. Be humble. Fame is man-given. Be grateful. Conceit is self-given. Be careful."

8. "If you don't have time to do it right, when will you have time to do it over?"

7. "Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are."

6. "A coach is someone who can give correction without causing resentment."

5. "Success if never final, failure is never fatal. It's courage that counts."

4. "If you're not making mistakes, then you're not doin anything. I'm positive that a doer makes mistakes."

3. "The main ingredient of stardom is the rest of the team."

2. "Never mistake activity for achievement."

1. "You can't live a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to repay you."

Family Farm Friday #20: More Bragging on California

"Right now we have three gnerations living and working here together, and so a lot of our family life and the farming kind of mesh." ~Kathie Brown

A couple weeks ago I posted a blog about these great advertisements about California family dairy farmers. I promised then that I had another California blog in the works, so here it is!

When I was in San Francisco last month for Bay to Breakers, I met up with my friend Gonzaga at the Ferry Building for the Farmer's Market on Saturday morning. I was so excited when she wanted to go, because this was one of my favorite things to do when I lived in San Francisco. I tried to go just about every weekend and took a lot of my summer visitors there as well.

The Ferry Building area is packed with vendors--selling everything you can imagine--fresh fruits, veggies, flowers, honey, cheese, baked goods, nuts....I'm telling you, it's phenominal. There is nothing like the fruit they have at this market---we're talking strawberries the size of your head (okay maybe I'm a little exaggerating...) that you can honestly smell from like 3 booths away (that part is true!). People who live in California take this stuff for granted. I'll assure you that in middle America, we don't get strawberries like that!

Anyway, at the market, there were all kinds of signs advertising products from family farms. I, of course, thought of the blog! They also have some great boards the discuss issues related to farming like land use and the importance of preserving farm land.

You might not think of San Francisco as being an ag-friendly place, but it really is. There are farmers markets all over the city, in just about every neighborhood, and they are always packed with people. As I've mentioned before, Yoga Master made dinner just about entirely from the Noe Valley farmer's market one night of my trip.

Sometimes we don't take the time to thank the "city folk" for supporting agriculture. We should do better--so way to go San Francisco! My only complaint is that they don't ship those strawberries to me!

Throwback Thursday #24: Gotta Love Football!

"Southern girls know their religions....Methodist, Baptist, and football." ~Unknown

This week's throwback Thursday story was inspired by one of the Oklahoma Girls, who posted the following on my facebook wall:

"Tiff...I need you to fill me in on this whole Football news thing. Are we no longer in the Big-12?? I just now know all about it, I don't know anything about this Pac-10 business, and I am pretty sure I don't like Pac-10. What does this mean for college football, am I going to have to re-learn everything you taught me??"

As a sidenote, I'm furious about this whole Big 12 situation, but that'll be another blog for another day!

Now, you may realize from reading hte blog that I am a total college football fanatic. I know stats, conferences, coaches, BCS games.....I've got it down. And, I talk about it all the time. During football season, you know where I'll be on a Saturday.

This rubbed off on two of my favorite girls, the Oklahoma Girl mentioned above and College Roomie. And, thus, the Throwback Thursday begins.

College Roomie and I were in our first year at OSU. We (of course) got student football tickets and were off to our first home game. It was the second weekend of the season, so needless to say, the weekend before College Roomie had been forced to deal with football on the tv for about 12 hours straight. So we're at the game, we kick off, the other team goes on offense. And then it comes. The best question ever. College Roomie rocks out with:

"Where's the line?"

I didn't know what she meant. I ask her to clarify. She responds:

"You know, the yellow line that shows how far they have to go?"

Needless to say, that started a few lessons---I'm now proud to say she's pretty well versed. She knows what positions are offense and defense, she knows how to talk trash about other conferences, and she knows that the yellow line is only on tv.
College football bonding.....I can't wait for the fall to arrive....yellow lines and all!

The Mouths of Seniors

"Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many." ~Author Unknown

I love old people. Always have. I know a lot of people dread aging, but I look forward to being an old lady. One of the main reasons: they can say whatever they want and it's funny and cute. I think old people say the best things. When we're young, we have to use a filter. But old people? They get to say whatever they want!

One of the Oklahoma Girls got a new job (yay!) where she works in a physical therapy office. She emailed me a funny story about what one of the old men who comes into the office said. Of course, a light bulb went off and I told her to make me a list of them for the blog! Here we go....

• Oklahoma Girl: Mr. G you are dressed very nice today, I love your shirt(its a pink paisley shirt, very in style).
  Mr. G: I would sure hope you like it, I have had it since 1978.


• There is a little old lady whose husband, Mr. W, just drops her off then comes and picks her up. Oklahoma Girl asked him, "Where do you go everyday when you drop her off?"
  He replied, "Well I go to Lowe's the expect me there, if I am not there, I let them down...and they really don't appreciate it."
• Mr.G.: "My wife said she needed to go on a diet. I told her, listen you are 90 yrs. old, you can eat whatever damn thing you want."


• Oklahoma Girl: "Good morning Mrs. J., where is your husband at today."
  Mrs. J.: "Do you think I need him to drive me all the time? I can drive myself you know, I ain't blind."

Nobody's Perfect....

"He's pitching against time. He's pitching against the future, against age, and even when you think about his career, against ending. And tonight I think he might be able to use that aching old arm one more time to push the sun back up in the sky and give us one more day of summer." ~ For Love of the Game

....even when you really are. Just ask Armando Galaragga.

For those of you non-sports fans out there, Galaragga is a pitcher in the MLB for the Detroit Tigers. Last week, he was on track to throw the perfect game.

For those of you who are really non-sports fans, the perfect game for a pitcher is where no runner gets on base. He doesn't have to strike every batter out, but the ones who do get a hit must be out at 1st base. I'd suggest watching Kevin Cosner in "For Love of the Game" to get a visual.

Perfect games are hard to come by. Only 20 have ever occurred in the history of professional baseball. This isn't a big deal. It's a legacy.

So back to Gallaraga. It was the ninth inning. He had already gotten two outs. One more out, and the perfect game, and his legacy, were in the books. He throws to a batter who hits a grounder. No problem--it's quickly fielded and thrown the first baseman. Then it happens. THE CALL. Safe. People are outraged--dismayed--there was no way the guy was safe and this would ruin Gallaraga's perfect game. The umpire had made the call, the batter was safe, and the perfect game was over.

Turns out, the ump was wrong. The video clearly shows that the player was out. Gallaraga threw the perfect game, but won't get credit for it. The umpire feels bad. Really bad. He's apologized and admited he made a mistake.

As for Gallaraga, he could have been a jerk and called out the ump, whined all over national tv and played the victim. He didn't. He sucked it up, accepted the apology, told the media that nobody's perfect (ironic) and everyone makes mistakes, and went back to work. In a world of famous movie stars and athletes who seem to get whatever they want and whine when anything doesn't go their way, Gallaraga is one of a kind. Good for him. And he didn't walk away empty handed. GM gave the pitcher a corvette.

Maybe he didn't have the perfect game in the books, but it seems to me like he played this situation out perfectly.

THAT Question

"At any given age, it's all about what's right for you then. So when and if you're ready to share the sheets with someone permanently, you'll make that bridal registry. If it's at thirty then it's at thirty. If it's at fifty, then it's at fifty. And if it's not on your list, you don't have to pencil it in. Last time I checked there were still plently of mountains you could climb, medical cures that only you could discover, and you're late for your date with world peace." ~Jerusha Stewart, The Single Girl's Manifesta



"Are you married?" "Marital Status?"


For the life of me, I do not understand why THAT question has to come up as often as it does.

I had to go to the eye doctor last week. You should understand in general that this puts me in a bad mood for several reasons. First, I don't like doctors. Never have. Second, in the 2nd grade I got glasses. The doctor told me that I'd outgrow my need for them. Here we are some 18 years later and I'm still in them. Good call, doc. Third, it's expensive. I have to wear bifocals (have since I was 16, cool, I know) and getting the no line bifocal lenses will just about make a person go broke! Anyway, it's with this mindset with which I went in to the doctor's office.


They copy my insurance card and then give me a stack of papers to fill out. Name, date of birth, address.....and then there it is. THAT question. Now, what possible relevance does it have to the eye doctor if I'm married or not? Does that affect the type of eye exam I get? The perscription that he comes up with? No. It doesn't.


College Roomie tried to stick up for the doctor by arguing that they needed to know in case of an emergency. But that can't be true because there is a whole section for "Emergency Contact" that lets you list a name, number and relationship to you. So, I ask again, what's the relevance of THAT question?


And why does it have to be THAT question? Why don't forms have a "College Graduate?" question? Or a "Pay Your Own Bills?" question? Or maybe a "Traveled Overseas?" question? All of these things are important to the people who do them, just like THAT question is important to the people who are married. I just don't see why their question is on all the forms and my suggestions aren't.


I really wanted to do an adendum to my form that answered THAT question as "Single, but....." and then listing out all the great parts about my life. I decided against it for two reasons. First, they might think I'm crazy. Second, I didn't want to offend anyone and get my eye poked out by that little machine that tests the pressure or whatever!


So, instead, I pent up my anger and saved it for the blog. Whew...feel better now. (Note to those of you freaking out that I'm going to die alone with a cat....I really do want to get married some day. And I really don't like cats.)

Family Farm Friday #19: How Rich We Are

"I forgot how much I love that smell of the dirt fresh off the plow, that tailgate rattle, tires on gravel, I sure do love that sound...." ~Mark Wills, Things We Forget

Last week my dad forwarded me this email. Those of you who know my dad understand why I still get a kick out of the face that he actually learned to send emails. Some things never cease to amaze.

Anyway, it was a great email that is perfect for Family Farm Friday. Here goes:

One day , the father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the express purpose of showing him how poor people live. They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family.

On their return from their trip , the father asked his son, "How was the trip?"

"It was great , Dad."
"Did you see how poor people live?" the father asked.
"Oh yeah , " said the son.
"So , tell me , what did you learn from the trip?" asked the father.

The son answered:
"I saw that we have one dog and they had four.
We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has no end.
We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night.
Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon.
We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight.
We have servants who serve us , but they serve others.
We buy our food , but they grow theirs.
We have walls around our property to protect us , they have friends to protect them."
The boy's father was speechless.
Then his son added , "Thanks Dad for showing me how poor we are."
I think most of us who grew up on a family farm or ranch understand this story completely. We are blessed with opportunities, friends, families, and a way of life that so many others miss out on.

The rich boy from the city was grateful to his dad for showing him how rich the farm family was. I'm thankful to mine for giving me the oppotunity to have grown up that way.

Throwback Thursday #23: My Favorite Friends Moment

"True friendship isn't about being there when it's convenient; it's about being there when it's not.” ~Unknown

I've often said that everything in life relates back to an episode of Friends. Of all the tv shows I've watched (with the exception of Friday Night Lights being like my small town, sports crazed high school), Friends is the one that seems to have been the most relatable to my life. It's sort of ironic that I'd relate to a bunch of New York City people, but I do. I think I relate to their friendships more than anything. I was thinking this week about an incident in college that was a total Friends moment.

First off, you have to understand the dynamics of my college friends. Although I had a lot of friends, my closest group of friends were The Animal House Boys. The Boys were 5 or 6 ag college guys, most of whom were on the judging team, all of whom I love to death.

I lived with College Roomie in an apartment right next to campus. The Boys lived at Animal House just outside of town. As much time as we spent together, we might as well have all just gotten one huge house and lived together. Our doors were never locked--just like on Friends. It was not uncommon for me to come home from work or class and find one of The Boys crashed out on the couch, watching tv, or rummaging through the fridge between classes. Likewise, no one ever thought twice about walking into Animal House and finding me there. It was like one, big happy family....like Friends.

So one Wednesday night, College Roomie and I made dinner, accidentally boiled over some pasta (honestly not an uncommon occurrance....we frequently set off the smoke alarm while cooking), ate and rushed out the door to church. We got back from church, walked into the apartment and smack into a horrible smell of gas. Turns out, when we boiled over the pasta, it put out the pilot light, but we didn't turn off the gas stove. So we're freaking out thinking we might explode. I remember screams of "Don't light a candle!" "Don't turn on the light!" "I'm getting dizzy" being thrown around. In the crisis, we made a plan.

We changed into our pjs, opened all the windows, locked the door (becuase this made TOTAL sense), grabbed our blankets and pillows off oru beds, and loaded up in the car. Destination: Animal House. I'm sure we were a sight to see, coming walking up in pjs, all stressed out, lugging our bedding.

We opened the front door at Animal House. One of The Boys was on the couch, another on the loveseat. I said, "We have to stay here tonight." Without missing a beat or asking a question, The Boy on the couch scooted over and patted the seat next to him. The Boy on the loveseat went into the kitchen to get us something to drink. That was the end of the discussion.

So, Friends fans, do you know the episode this reminded me of? The time Phoebe caught her apartment on fire with the candles (but blamed Rachel's straightener) and they moved in with Monica and Joey. There was really no discussion, just friends who needed a place to stay. That's how Friends was for Rachel and Phoebe, and that's how Animal House and The Boys was for College Romie and me.

That's real friendship. When you almost blow up your house and need a place to stay, no one asks questions. They just scoot over and get you a drink.

May Updates

“Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain, and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams.” ~Ashley Smith

The month of May was pretty insane for me. I checked off three (probably a record for one month!) bucket list items, took two awesome trips, and got to spend time with a lot of really great friends. Here are just a few updates from blogs past.

Bull Semen Ordered! I think it might have been everyone's favorite blog....Bull Semen and Bonding. Well, the time has come to make our decisions and order our semen. After a lot of deliberation and studying and strategizing.....we've finished. Dad bought Ali 2. We had this great plan to surprise my dad for Father's Day with Indian Outlaw semen, but the stubborn old man wouldn't let us talk him out of buying it himself! So that idea is shot! I bought Bojo. Denton is getting some from a friend in Texas. So we should be set. Let the games begin!

Dumping The Girl Friends Started a Firestorm! Well I didn't expect to start a controversial discussion on my blog page, but I have to admit I loved it! I want to write more pieces that get this type of conversation flowing. In case you missed the drama, read the post and subsequent comments. Anonymous had a difference of opinion, which started the conversaton off. I wasn't surprised to see Laura chime in on my side--I know she's gone through similar situations with the boys in her life. I felt like Kristin's input was extremely valuable, becuase she is a wife and has a perspective that Laura and I can't offer. Please feel free to add in your two cents--I do LOVE blog comments!

Miss Independent Continued! So you remember my blog about fixing the dryer (which caused quite a bit of trash talking on facebook between my two favorite cousins!) a couple weeks ago. Well, my independent girl streak continued when I built a new chair and ottoman. I had to haul all the stuff up from the car myself, put it together myself, and move it to the correct location myself. And you know what? I did it. And it's awesome. Here are pictures of my two projects.

Quote of the Month! You've read a lot about my Oklahoma Girls in the past. They are constantly coming up with the funniest quotes ever. This month, I'll crown one of the Oklahoma Girls as having the quote of the month.

"Did you hear about the tornado in Stillwater last night....don't worry, I checked and the Penny is okay."

For those of you who may not know, the Penny was our college bar. Classic.

I'll be back with another update at the end of June....so if you can think of any prior blogs you'd like to read some follow up on...let me know!

Happiness Project Month 1: Increasing Energy

“Nothing can bring you happiness but yourself.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

First month of the Happiness Project down. (Quick side note--the author of the book, herself, commented on my first post! This was so one of the most exciting things to happen in my blogging experience.)

The goal of the first month is to improve my energy level. The author of the book set four goals: to sleep more; to exercise more; to clear out clutter; and to act energetic. So, because I'm pretty good about sleeping and exercising, and I'm not sure how much I believe the "act how you want to feel" mantra, I improvised a little.

I identified three goals: napping, cleaning and clearing out clutter.


1. Napping: I love to take a nap. Seriously, I'd rather get up early and be able to sleep for an hour in the afternoon. I blame my Gran for this--you read about her recently--she took a nap every afternoon when I was growing up and I thought it was really cool! Since I have a job where I'm crazy busy (and bill by the hour!) napping during the week is not an option. So, instead, I decided that I'd include time for one nap every weekend. So far, it's worked out well and I do think it improves my mood.

2. Cleaning: So I'm a very organized person, but I tend to let cleaning slide a bit. It just seems to take so much time and energy to dust and mop and vaacum (is it two a's or two u's in that word? or two c's? I don't know) and clean the shower. For a while now I've just felt sort of overwhelmed and like I spent too much of my weekend doing this stuff. I knew a couple of people who I went to law school with or work with who hired someone to clean for them once every other week or so. I felt really guilty about this--who did I think I was that I was too good to do my own cleaning? Yea....then I asked around and realzied EVERYONE I work with and a ton of other young lawyers I know have one. I invested. Pretty sure when I walked in after she was done and my house smelled like heaven, it was well worth the money! Happy---check!


3. Clearing out clutter: This has been AMAZING for me! Like I said, I'm very organized. If you came into my house, things would pretty much be put away where they belong and I could tell you where they were. I am, however, also somewhat of a packrat. I blame my Gran for this as well. She grew up in the depression and saved everything. When she died and we cleaned out the kitchen, I bet she had a million canning jars and those plastic bags you put fruit in at the grocery store. She had medicine that expired ten years earlier and a case full of fake teeth. Apparently, she rubbed off on me.

Well, the author of the book had a couple rules. If you save something because you "might need to use it later" you need to throw it away. And if you save something for purely sentimental reasons, throw it away. (There are exceptions of course---pictures, family heirloom jewelery, etc.) The last rule College Roomie and I developed....."Free clutter is still clutter."

So I started out in my office area. I threw away 7 bags full of stuff one weekend. Old cases I printed out for law school my first year. Old books, folders, magazines. I moved a shelf of plastic drawers from the bathroom to the office and found medicine that expired when I was still in high school and lotion I remember buying in the 8th grade. I found a sample size cologne that was the kind First Valentine wore....which indicates this has been around since circa 6th grade. Yea. It was amazing. I so should have done a before picture, but here's an after.

Then I moved to my laundry room, which was full of boxes and junk and totally a mess. I moved in some shelves, discovered that my dryer was jacked up (you read about that earlier) and threw out 5 more loads of stuff. Again, no before picture, but here's an after.
The latest project was the garage. While it wasn't a terrible mess, it needed some cleaning out done. My friend who lived here before me planned her whole wedding and kept everything in her garage, so it needed some sweeping away of bits of wedding decor. And I saved my moving boxes which needed to be broken down and neatly put away. Now it looks pretty good if I do say so myself.
Those were my three big goals for cleaning out clutter, but I liked it so much, I expanded into my pantry and closets.
Anyway, so far the Happiness Project has been great. I do feel happier and more productive.
Stay tuned for next month.....the author worked on her marriage the second month. I don't have one of those, so instead I've got a totally different idea, and let me assure you, I'm excited!