That Time I Said "Syphilis" In A Eulogy.

"We all die. The goal isn't to live forever, the goal is to create something that will." ~ Chuck Palahniuk

Intrigued? A snappy title is always a good way to start a semi-sad blog post.

As you might remember from last week, my Uncle David passed away. My aunt and cousins asked me to speak at the funeral. At first, I wasn't totally sure I could do it, but let's be honest, how do you say no to something so important? And that, is how I ended up giving a eulogy.

I'll admit that I did attempt to calm some nerves by making a deal with Cousin Kevin that involved a pre-funeral "business meeting" and two shot glasses. I can always count on him. Turned into a sort of bonding experience I don't think I'll ever forget.

My instruction for the eulogy was to make it as much fun as life was with Uncle David. Like I said at the funeral, that was not possible, but I did my best to make everyone laugh. I told stories about bar fights that landed him and Uncle Buddy under a pool table, and about him getting arrested for roping hippies, and about him punching out his college professor. Stories about great pranks played on each other by family members over the years. Stories about York pigs and York sisters and mowing down my grandma's favorite flower bush. I thought I was pretty clever.

How did the word "syphilis" get included you wonder? Good question. Aunt Midge wanted to include a story about each of the 8 grandchildren. She chose the stories and wrote them up for me. One involved my little cousin Baby Quarterback (who you read about here) when he was about 4 or 5 years old. His dad, Cousin Kevin, convinced Baby Quarterback that he had this amazing thing that only the toughest guys and best athletes have. And it was called.....syphilis. So Baby Quarterback called Uncle David all excited to tell him the great news. Uncle David's response? "Don't tell your grandma!" Classic.

If there's one thing that I took away from that funeral, it was that one person's life can impact so many others. The funeral was in a gym, becuase the churches in town were not big enough to hold the people. My ND Friend may have put it best when she said, "Who you are is better because of who he was." Countless people can say that about Uncle David. In the end, what more can you ask for?

And after the funeral, we fulfilled Uncle David's deathbed instruction---to have a party. The whole family--30 of us or so spent New Years Eve in a hunting lodge just hanging out, laughing and telling stories. It wasn't Times Square or the Vegas Strip or kissing Mr. Right at midnight....but it was exactly where I needed to be. I think it was the perfect tribute.
Aunt Elaine summed it up, when she said we did the whole thing, eulogy to post-funeral party, "Uncle David style." I think he'd be proud.